i picked up some new walking phones yesterday. i can't mix with these phones - they are too heavy in their bass. i am getting interference from them that is easily blocked with a blanket, but it's different - it's on the low end.
i think the interference is environmental, but that it's probably a short, too. fixing the short will probably fix the interference.
i'm going to finish the record with the tinfoil and get some new cables in the new year - nothing to lose from trying. no clear conclusion yet.
Wednesday, December 23, 2015
Tuesday, December 22, 2015
i spent the last two days double-verifying everything and do not plan to make any further changes. but, i need a day or two more to finish it, and then probably a week to finish the peripherals.
new phones are likely tomorrow.
but, we have a holiday in canada called "boxing day" where everything is on sale. it might be worth waiting.
that's the day after christmas.
new phones are likely tomorrow.
but, we have a holiday in canada called "boxing day" where everything is on sale. it might be worth waiting.
that's the day after christmas.
Friday, December 18, 2015
i'm extremely confident that i've worked the driver issue i've been having down to an issue of radio interference. i also believe that there is magnetic interference in the neighbourhood, likely emanating from the power lines. i believe that the issue is as follows:
1) there is a short in my headphones. this was one of the first things i checked, and rejected, because i got the same issue out of two sets of headphones. but, i believe now that there are actually shorts in both phones, against the odds.
2) the magnetic field in the neighbourhood is interacting with the short, which is charging the phones.
3) this is turning the phones into a radio antenna, which is picking up radio frequency interference from local broadcasters (and perhaps other random sources, as well).
i will need to purchase new headphones next week, because my walking phones shorted out entirely. i will be able to better understand the nature of the problem then, and likely confirm the above hypothesis.
in the mean time, i have been able to block the radio waves by shielding my phones with tin foil. as such, i expect to finally finalize this remix record by the end of the weekend. this will allow me to complete a large amount of filing over the next few weeks, and be ready to move into period 3 by the beginning of the new year.
https://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/album/inriclaimed
1) there is a short in my headphones. this was one of the first things i checked, and rejected, because i got the same issue out of two sets of headphones. but, i believe now that there are actually shorts in both phones, against the odds.
2) the magnetic field in the neighbourhood is interacting with the short, which is charging the phones.
3) this is turning the phones into a radio antenna, which is picking up radio frequency interference from local broadcasters (and perhaps other random sources, as well).
i will need to purchase new headphones next week, because my walking phones shorted out entirely. i will be able to better understand the nature of the problem then, and likely confirm the above hypothesis.
in the mean time, i have been able to block the radio waves by shielding my phones with tin foil. as such, i expect to finally finalize this remix record by the end of the weekend. this will allow me to complete a large amount of filing over the next few weeks, and be ready to move into period 3 by the beginning of the new year.
https://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/album/inriclaimed
Thursday, December 17, 2015
i actually shielded the phones with aluminum foil and it seems to have worked.
i'll have to go get some phones next week. that will tell me if i have a short in the cable, or if the interference in here is just really strong.
in the mean time, i think i can actually finally get some work done over the weekend. fingers crossed.
i'll have to go get some phones next week. that will tell me if i have a short in the cable, or if the interference in here is just really strong.
in the mean time, i think i can actually finally get some work done over the weekend. fingers crossed.
Wednesday, December 16, 2015
so, just trying to work things through a little...
i'm convinced that what i'm picking up is radio static. at the frequency level it's at - 5000-15000 hz - it pretty much has to be that. and, it seems too low to be wifi or cell or whatever. it's the frequency that a radio signal operates at, so it's gotta be a radio signal.
the questions i need to figure out are:
1) can i find a way to block the radio signals in the unit?
2) given that it seems to have something to do with the power lines or the streetlights as well, is it the case that these things are affecting my headphones and turning them into a receiver or is it the case that these things are affecting the radio waves and turning them into a relayer? that is, are my phones getting charged (and can i shield them?) or is the signal getting amplified (and then what?).
see, here's the thing: i seemed to be able to block it with a towel. you can't block a magnetic field with a towel. but you can block a radio signal with a towel.
that suggests to me that i may have a solution in building some kind of fort.
i'm hoping my landlord has a gaussmeter. that will help a lot.
but, i think i really just need to go ahead and get the new cords, already. i mean, the worst thing that can happen is that i'll have extra cords.
christmas deposits come in early, it'll be a next week thing.
my walking phones are also demoed, which will be a gst check thing at the beginning of january. they were a christmas present three years ago. i immediately knew that the connector on the noise cancelling unit would break. i didn't think they'd last three years, even. i can unscrew the unit, but the break is too high on the line - i'd have to cut and splice it. they're not worth it, really. i'd rather just get some cleaner phones. so, merry christmas to me...
or...
why don't i get some new phones next week, and then test to see if the interference is gone, then get some new cords if it is?
yeah. that's more logical.
i'm convinced that what i'm picking up is radio static. at the frequency level it's at - 5000-15000 hz - it pretty much has to be that. and, it seems too low to be wifi or cell or whatever. it's the frequency that a radio signal operates at, so it's gotta be a radio signal.
the questions i need to figure out are:
1) can i find a way to block the radio signals in the unit?
2) given that it seems to have something to do with the power lines or the streetlights as well, is it the case that these things are affecting my headphones and turning them into a receiver or is it the case that these things are affecting the radio waves and turning them into a relayer? that is, are my phones getting charged (and can i shield them?) or is the signal getting amplified (and then what?).
see, here's the thing: i seemed to be able to block it with a towel. you can't block a magnetic field with a towel. but you can block a radio signal with a towel.
that suggests to me that i may have a solution in building some kind of fort.
i'm hoping my landlord has a gaussmeter. that will help a lot.
but, i think i really just need to go ahead and get the new cords, already. i mean, the worst thing that can happen is that i'll have extra cords.
christmas deposits come in early, it'll be a next week thing.
my walking phones are also demoed, which will be a gst check thing at the beginning of january. they were a christmas present three years ago. i immediately knew that the connector on the noise cancelling unit would break. i didn't think they'd last three years, even. i can unscrew the unit, but the break is too high on the line - i'd have to cut and splice it. they're not worth it, really. i'd rather just get some cleaner phones. so, merry christmas to me...
or...
why don't i get some new phones next week, and then test to see if the interference is gone, then get some new cords if it is?
yeah. that's more logical.
Tuesday, December 15, 2015
yeah.
i did a compost run this morning, which was a long walk a good way from home, and it was interference free until i got a few blocks from home.
whatever the cause of this is, it's transmitting over several city blocks. it's a bloody huge field.
short of getting the city or the utility or whatever else it is to get to the source, there is no way to stop the interference. that is now clear to me. it's not in my control. my only option is to try and block it.
i learned during the walk that my walking phones have a short. the initial logic was "either it's interference or both phones are shorted. it's unlikely that both phones are shorted. so, it must be interference."
and, it is clear that there is interference.
but, it might also be the case that both phones are shorted.
if i can prove to myself that my studio phones are shorted, and replacing the cord fixes that, then that's good enough for now.
but, i also need to figure out how to approach this huge multi-block field i find myself living in, too.
i did a compost run this morning, which was a long walk a good way from home, and it was interference free until i got a few blocks from home.
whatever the cause of this is, it's transmitting over several city blocks. it's a bloody huge field.
short of getting the city or the utility or whatever else it is to get to the source, there is no way to stop the interference. that is now clear to me. it's not in my control. my only option is to try and block it.
i learned during the walk that my walking phones have a short. the initial logic was "either it's interference or both phones are shorted. it's unlikely that both phones are shorted. so, it must be interference."
and, it is clear that there is interference.
but, it might also be the case that both phones are shorted.
if i can prove to myself that my studio phones are shorted, and replacing the cord fixes that, then that's good enough for now.
but, i also need to figure out how to approach this huge multi-block field i find myself living in, too.
Sunday, December 13, 2015
12/13-12-2015: a clear conclusion that the source of the interference is outside the apartment
tracks worked on in this vlog:
https://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/album/inriclaimed
https://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/album/inriclaimed
suspected interference problem
jessica
hi.
i'm just wondering how i go about the process of investigating a possible interference problem, and possibly having it fixed.
i'm an electronic musician, so i spend a lot of time listening to unusual effects collages and i consequently have very sensitive ears. i've been noticing strange audio behaviour out of my system since july, and it has taken me a very long time to go through the process of checking various causes and ruling various things out.
after checking driver conflicts, os settings, ground issues, cords and everything else you could imagine, i've finally settled on interference as the root cause because it seems to be unpredictable. it will be fine for a few hours, then distort for a few days. the interference seems to fade in the early morning, and especially on saturday mornings.
the interference i'm getting is relatively high frequency. it's in the radio spectrum. it's a distortion roughly between 5000-10000 hz, maybe a little higher, and often a functional low pass somewhere around 10,000 hz.
i get this interference from multiple pairs of headphones out of multiple systems on multiple circuits. in fact, i even get it from a standalone pocket-mp3 player. but, i've been assuming for the last few weeks that the source was indoors and trying to locate it.
today, i took that pocket mp3 player for a walk around the neighbourhood and noticed that the interference was actually even worse outside, in the immediate vicinity of my dwelling. if i walk a few blocks in any direction, it seems to mostly dissipate.
there was some intense jackhammering in my neighbourhood over the summer, as the sewers were replaced. i'm slowly coming to an understanding that something may have been damaged at that time and it's been feeding out signal ever since, in a way that is proportional to how much electricity is being pulled into the neighbourhood.
do you have a process to deal with this sort of thing? how do i get it started?
hydro one
Thank you for contacting us to bring this issue to our attention.
Please provide your property address, meter number and/or Hydro One account number in a reply email and we will be happy to investigate further.
For more information on Hydro One, visit: www.hydroone.com.
jessica
hi.
i'm a renter, so i don't have the account information. but, i'm located at
805 marion ave,
windsor ontario,
n9a 2h8
i also have some more information to provide you with.
i went for a long walk with my mp3 player and headphones around the city yesterday. i've determined that there is no interference south of erie or east of ouellette.
i believe i'm actually picking up radio frequencies in the phones, but that there must be some environmental factor - likely related to the power lines or the streetlights - that is amplifying it when i walk through the affected area, which is north of erie and west of ouellette, at least as far as where i live (i haven't determined exact boundaries to the north or west of the affected area).
what i think is that some kind of maintenance in the area has disrupted the lines, which has created a large magnetic field that is proportional to the amount of current running through the lines. this magnetic field is then messing with my phones, turning them into a receiver for the normal radio frequencies running through the area.
i may be able to get some readings on a gaussmeter over the next few days and will forward them to you if i do.
hydro one
Dear Ms. Murray,
Thank you for your reply.
Unfortunately, Hydro One Networks does not service this area. Please contact Windsor Utilities at 519-255-2727.
hi.
i'm just wondering how i go about the process of investigating a possible interference problem, and possibly having it fixed.
i'm an electronic musician, so i spend a lot of time listening to unusual effects collages and i consequently have very sensitive ears. i've been noticing strange audio behaviour out of my system since july, and it has taken me a very long time to go through the process of checking various causes and ruling various things out.
after checking driver conflicts, os settings, ground issues, cords and everything else you could imagine, i've finally settled on interference as the root cause because it seems to be unpredictable. it will be fine for a few hours, then distort for a few days. the interference seems to fade in the early morning, and especially on saturday mornings.
the interference i'm getting is relatively high frequency. it's in the radio spectrum. it's a distortion roughly between 5000-10000 hz, maybe a little higher, and often a functional low pass somewhere around 10,000 hz.
i get this interference from multiple pairs of headphones out of multiple systems on multiple circuits. in fact, i even get it from a standalone pocket-mp3 player. but, i've been assuming for the last few weeks that the source was indoors and trying to locate it.
today, i took that pocket mp3 player for a walk around the neighbourhood and noticed that the interference was actually even worse outside, in the immediate vicinity of my dwelling. if i walk a few blocks in any direction, it seems to mostly dissipate.
there was some intense jackhammering in my neighbourhood over the summer, as the sewers were replaced. i'm slowly coming to an understanding that something may have been damaged at that time and it's been feeding out signal ever since, in a way that is proportional to how much electricity is being pulled into the neighbourhood.
do you have a process to deal with this sort of thing? how do i get it started?
hydro one
Thank you for contacting us to bring this issue to our attention.
Please provide your property address, meter number and/or Hydro One account number in a reply email and we will be happy to investigate further.
For more information on Hydro One, visit: www.hydroone.com.
jessica
hi.
i'm a renter, so i don't have the account information. but, i'm located at
805 marion ave,
windsor ontario,
n9a 2h8
i also have some more information to provide you with.
i went for a long walk with my mp3 player and headphones around the city yesterday. i've determined that there is no interference south of erie or east of ouellette.
i believe i'm actually picking up radio frequencies in the phones, but that there must be some environmental factor - likely related to the power lines or the streetlights - that is amplifying it when i walk through the affected area, which is north of erie and west of ouellette, at least as far as where i live (i haven't determined exact boundaries to the north or west of the affected area).
what i think is that some kind of maintenance in the area has disrupted the lines, which has created a large magnetic field that is proportional to the amount of current running through the lines. this magnetic field is then messing with my phones, turning them into a receiver for the normal radio frequencies running through the area.
i may be able to get some readings on a gaussmeter over the next few days and will forward them to you if i do.
hydro one
Dear Ms. Murray,
Thank you for your reply.
Unfortunately, Hydro One Networks does not service this area. Please contact Windsor Utilities at 519-255-2727.
so...
i took a walk around the neighbourhood and the source of interference appears to be the power lines. it fades if i walk in any direction.
the city did some sewer replacements over the summer. much jackhammering. possible cause.
i *think* i can contact the utility company about this...
yeah. i may have wasted six months due to broken fucking power lines.
i took a walk around the neighbourhood and the source of interference appears to be the power lines. it fades if i walk in any direction.
the city did some sewer replacements over the summer. much jackhammering. possible cause.
i *think* i can contact the utility company about this...
yeah. i may have wasted six months due to broken fucking power lines.
Wednesday, December 2, 2015
Tuesday, December 1, 2015
i got some blood test results back today.
the real reason for the blood test was to check my estrogen levels, which was actually done on my request. i've been thinking for a while now that i should get my dose boosted. but, i was running around from doctor to doctor and just didn't really get a chance to get an empirical test done to determine what the levels were and whether they should be boosted. as expected, they're a little low.
that's actually pretty normal. it's an expected part of transitioning to increase dosages after a while. i'm actually way past due on this. so, i've been boosted from 4 mg/day to 6 mg/day. but, i'm going to wait until i quit smoking first before i do it.
i've been stuck on this remix project for months because my machine just won't behave, and have been waiting until i'm done the project before i give myself a few weeks of filing to occupy myself with. for me, quitting smoking is primarily a problem at the mental level. basically, i find myself unable to focus on anything. it's a huge problem for me because i'm always focusing on something or other. the only way i'm going to get over the smoking is by giving myself something menial to do for, like, weeks. i just have to throw that time away. that's really hard for me - even if i get the long term benefits of it - because i interpret time as the only meaningful quantifiable in the entire universe. the filing is the perfect opportunity for this. but i can't get to it because i can't get the machine to co-operate.
i've been getting impatient, anyways. i only budgeted myself $60 for cigarettes this month. that needs to be a hard limit, now. smoking ends when that budget runs out, whether i'm done the project or not. the hormone switch is just an added incentive.
first, nicotine is an estrogen suppressant. second, smoking on estrogen can cause blood clots. i shouldn't be smoking at all, really - well, *at all*, but at all when i'm taking hormones. it's a risk for people on birth control, which is something like 100 mcg/day. i'm about to jump to 6 mg/day. i'm hesitant about the safety of this. i should really be hesitant about the safety of it at 4 mg/day.
but, he also told me that i'm the "healthiest person he's ever seen". he's "never seen lower blood cholesterol". it seemed obvious to him to ask me about my diet, but he seemed rather disappointed in my responses.
in the 96 hours before the blood test, i had consumed 5 rockstar vodkas, several pots of coffee, several packs of cigarettes and had even smoked a couple of bowls. ten hours previous to the blood test, i had a large meal that included a giant plate of pasta with a third of a brick of cheese, caesar dressing (not light.) as an alfredo sauce, eight slices of crumpled salami, tomatoes and green peppers. i also had a smoothie with a banana, five strawberries, two scoops of ice cream and about 500 ml of soy milk. i've actually had exactly that meal almost every day for the last two months - although i got a pizza one day, and have had some doritos in between as well.
i'll post the link to the culinary series in my vlog as a comment.
that doesn't come off as a particularly healthy diet. he liked the soy smoothies, and didn't like the salami and the cheese. he thought i must be eating some kind of miracle foods like quinoa or something.
while my diet is consciously designed to ensure i get sufficient nutrients (the soy smoothies are key to this, but i also would normally eat a lot of eggs to get my amino acids), it is really not designed to minimize so-called harmful foods - except in the sense that i do not eat a lot. i eat, at most, once a day - most days. once in a while, i won't eat at all.
the correct way to interpret the test results is as confirmation of my approach to food, which i've posted here a few times over the last few years. that is, the important thing to realize is that it isn't the content of the food that is important, but the quantity of it that you consume.
basically, your body stores everything almost exactly the same way. it may not be the most politically correct thing to say, but the actual hard reality of it is that if you're too fat or you have too much cholesterol then you simply eat too much. the way to minimize excess fat storage in the various ways that your body stores fat - which includes blood cholesterol - is to ensure that you're not giving your body too much fuel, because it will then store it as some kind of fat.
my blood cholesterol is not low because of what i eat. it's low because of how much i eat.
but, even that said, there is an even more dominant factor, and it's lifestyle. i walk everywhere. i walked about 40 minutes to the doctor's office today, in fact. i then walked to the grocery store to get some more very high fat caesar dressing for my high fat pasta diet. the reason i do this is that i don't have a car.
that is the actual takeaway: i am the healthiest person the doctor has ever seen because i do not have a car. and, if you want to be that healthy, too? then, stop using your car on a day-to-day basis. walk as much as you can.
i'm proof of it. most nutritionists would claim my diet is terrible (but they're wrong, because the quantity of what i consume is low). i smoke two things. i don't drink a lot of alcohol, but i had consumed some within a few days of the blood test. and, i drink at least a pot of coffee a day.
but, my heart is in pristine condition!
and, it's simply because i don't have a car.
the real reason for the blood test was to check my estrogen levels, which was actually done on my request. i've been thinking for a while now that i should get my dose boosted. but, i was running around from doctor to doctor and just didn't really get a chance to get an empirical test done to determine what the levels were and whether they should be boosted. as expected, they're a little low.
that's actually pretty normal. it's an expected part of transitioning to increase dosages after a while. i'm actually way past due on this. so, i've been boosted from 4 mg/day to 6 mg/day. but, i'm going to wait until i quit smoking first before i do it.
i've been stuck on this remix project for months because my machine just won't behave, and have been waiting until i'm done the project before i give myself a few weeks of filing to occupy myself with. for me, quitting smoking is primarily a problem at the mental level. basically, i find myself unable to focus on anything. it's a huge problem for me because i'm always focusing on something or other. the only way i'm going to get over the smoking is by giving myself something menial to do for, like, weeks. i just have to throw that time away. that's really hard for me - even if i get the long term benefits of it - because i interpret time as the only meaningful quantifiable in the entire universe. the filing is the perfect opportunity for this. but i can't get to it because i can't get the machine to co-operate.
i've been getting impatient, anyways. i only budgeted myself $60 for cigarettes this month. that needs to be a hard limit, now. smoking ends when that budget runs out, whether i'm done the project or not. the hormone switch is just an added incentive.
first, nicotine is an estrogen suppressant. second, smoking on estrogen can cause blood clots. i shouldn't be smoking at all, really - well, *at all*, but at all when i'm taking hormones. it's a risk for people on birth control, which is something like 100 mcg/day. i'm about to jump to 6 mg/day. i'm hesitant about the safety of this. i should really be hesitant about the safety of it at 4 mg/day.
but, he also told me that i'm the "healthiest person he's ever seen". he's "never seen lower blood cholesterol". it seemed obvious to him to ask me about my diet, but he seemed rather disappointed in my responses.
in the 96 hours before the blood test, i had consumed 5 rockstar vodkas, several pots of coffee, several packs of cigarettes and had even smoked a couple of bowls. ten hours previous to the blood test, i had a large meal that included a giant plate of pasta with a third of a brick of cheese, caesar dressing (not light.) as an alfredo sauce, eight slices of crumpled salami, tomatoes and green peppers. i also had a smoothie with a banana, five strawberries, two scoops of ice cream and about 500 ml of soy milk. i've actually had exactly that meal almost every day for the last two months - although i got a pizza one day, and have had some doritos in between as well.
i'll post the link to the culinary series in my vlog as a comment.
that doesn't come off as a particularly healthy diet. he liked the soy smoothies, and didn't like the salami and the cheese. he thought i must be eating some kind of miracle foods like quinoa or something.
while my diet is consciously designed to ensure i get sufficient nutrients (the soy smoothies are key to this, but i also would normally eat a lot of eggs to get my amino acids), it is really not designed to minimize so-called harmful foods - except in the sense that i do not eat a lot. i eat, at most, once a day - most days. once in a while, i won't eat at all.
the correct way to interpret the test results is as confirmation of my approach to food, which i've posted here a few times over the last few years. that is, the important thing to realize is that it isn't the content of the food that is important, but the quantity of it that you consume.
basically, your body stores everything almost exactly the same way. it may not be the most politically correct thing to say, but the actual hard reality of it is that if you're too fat or you have too much cholesterol then you simply eat too much. the way to minimize excess fat storage in the various ways that your body stores fat - which includes blood cholesterol - is to ensure that you're not giving your body too much fuel, because it will then store it as some kind of fat.
my blood cholesterol is not low because of what i eat. it's low because of how much i eat.
but, even that said, there is an even more dominant factor, and it's lifestyle. i walk everywhere. i walked about 40 minutes to the doctor's office today, in fact. i then walked to the grocery store to get some more very high fat caesar dressing for my high fat pasta diet. the reason i do this is that i don't have a car.
that is the actual takeaway: i am the healthiest person the doctor has ever seen because i do not have a car. and, if you want to be that healthy, too? then, stop using your car on a day-to-day basis. walk as much as you can.
i'm proof of it. most nutritionists would claim my diet is terrible (but they're wrong, because the quantity of what i consume is low). i smoke two things. i don't drink a lot of alcohol, but i had consumed some within a few days of the blood test. and, i drink at least a pot of coffee a day.
but, my heart is in pristine condition!
and, it's simply because i don't have a car.
Wednesday, November 25, 2015
25-11-2015: the vampire diaries
tracks worked on in this vlog:
1) https://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/track/aliens-are-more-likely-than-god
1) https://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/track/aliens-are-more-likely-than-god
Sunday, November 22, 2015
one last night out before the major detox
so, i will fully acknowledge - despite rationalizations otherwise - that the reason i went to the show on friday night was to get a last night of smoking in. which, on the bright side, at least suggests i'm serious about stopping. i think i have to be.
that said, i also felt the headliner was worth documenting. to an extent, this is partly what a lot of these show reviews have always been about. now that i have the camera (however low quality it may be....), i feel an added sense of responsibility to be curating. because my taste is superior. of course.
--
i wasn't sure if i was going to miss the opening act or not, and wasn't really concerned about it if i did. i kind of expected the show to start late, but not quite as late as it started - i did catch the opening act, and snapped a little bit of footage.
it very mildly piqued my interest in what it was, namely a splice of mathy indie rock with alt-country-pop-whatever. i don't know who to blame for it (wilco?), but indie rock turned into country music at some point a little over ten years ago and has basically been tedious and boring ever since. this act certainly demonstrated tedium and boredom, but the mathier aspects almost saved it...
i said almost. not quite. i'd say the rhythm section should drop the singer, if it can't convince her to drop the alt-country-pop-whatever schtick. there's nothing interesting going on there.
between sets i went out and had a smoke; i was feeling a little light-headed when i came back. probably the weather. but, it meant i watched most of the next set sitting down, and didn't get a chance to catch any footage.
the name of the band is exceedingly relevant: this is creepy shit. in an unsettling way. i think i'll leave it at that.
while it was meant to be comical, my general reaction was more that i felt embarrassed for them. which is no doubt in the range of intended reactions.
however, there was one song that had me doubled over laughing, and nearly crying. it may have been because i was feeling a little light-headed from the weather, but it was still one of the best laughs i've had in a while. i've found old footage of this track:
here is a full set:
the next band up was called nudie suits, and they seemed to be defined by a conflict: the violin player wants to do loop-heavy, post-gaze drone stuff whereas the keyboard player wants to do more conventional noir pop. the end result was that they were trying to play over each other. not always. they stopped and listened to each other a few times. but it was that conflict that overpowered.
i'm not entirely adverse to the idea of a riff-off in the context of gaze/drone vs. noir pop, but the truth is that neither had the chops to do it. the violin parts often just fizzled out into static feedback loops or two note patterns, and flopped on the builds. and the keyboard player often cycled around simple progressions, bent entirely on rooting herself in dynamics that were being completely paved over by the electronics.
the lack of footage was a conscious choice.
--
it was the material on valley hush' bandcamp page that drew me out (and made the smoking night worthwhile). While certainly pop, and maybe operating somewhere close to a successful and critically acclaimed contemporary act like tune yards, the overall songwriting struck me as worth documenting.
i only film one song and tend to pull it from between the second and fourth track. there's always the nightmare that you screw up the first track, which is also often going to be chosen to let the scragglers in. two-four is usually the meat of the set.
i pulled the third track, which meant i got one of the poppier numbers. overall, the set was a bit more developed than this, with more extended tracks that leaned into the realm of psychedelic rock without really falling into it.
it's pop. i know not everybody likes pop. i actually have a pretty hefty soft spot for it. but, realize i'm very picky about it, too. i'm only going to bite at a pop band if it's a really good one.
the show was late, as expected, but far more so than i realized. the last band was slotted for 11:15 - meaning they should have been done around 11:45. i knew it was later than that, but wasn't checking the time. the show wasn't done until 12:40; i would have guessed it was more like 12:15. but, had i been checking the clock more closely, i would have left a few minutes earlier.
while i do believe i got to rosa parks on time and should have been able to cut the bus off at the pass, i ended up missing it (unless it came out of customs well after 2:00, which is unlikely) by what could not have been more than a few minutes. i can only understand how this could happen by concluding that the bus left early.
you can imagine why this should not happen. there's more on this topic in the day's vlog:
http://dghjdfsghkrdghdgja.appspot.com/categories/shows/2015/11/20.html
that said, i also felt the headliner was worth documenting. to an extent, this is partly what a lot of these show reviews have always been about. now that i have the camera (however low quality it may be....), i feel an added sense of responsibility to be curating. because my taste is superior. of course.
--
i wasn't sure if i was going to miss the opening act or not, and wasn't really concerned about it if i did. i kind of expected the show to start late, but not quite as late as it started - i did catch the opening act, and snapped a little bit of footage.
it very mildly piqued my interest in what it was, namely a splice of mathy indie rock with alt-country-pop-whatever. i don't know who to blame for it (wilco?), but indie rock turned into country music at some point a little over ten years ago and has basically been tedious and boring ever since. this act certainly demonstrated tedium and boredom, but the mathier aspects almost saved it...
i said almost. not quite. i'd say the rhythm section should drop the singer, if it can't convince her to drop the alt-country-pop-whatever schtick. there's nothing interesting going on there.
between sets i went out and had a smoke; i was feeling a little light-headed when i came back. probably the weather. but, it meant i watched most of the next set sitting down, and didn't get a chance to catch any footage.
the name of the band is exceedingly relevant: this is creepy shit. in an unsettling way. i think i'll leave it at that.
while it was meant to be comical, my general reaction was more that i felt embarrassed for them. which is no doubt in the range of intended reactions.
however, there was one song that had me doubled over laughing, and nearly crying. it may have been because i was feeling a little light-headed from the weather, but it was still one of the best laughs i've had in a while. i've found old footage of this track:
here is a full set:
the next band up was called nudie suits, and they seemed to be defined by a conflict: the violin player wants to do loop-heavy, post-gaze drone stuff whereas the keyboard player wants to do more conventional noir pop. the end result was that they were trying to play over each other. not always. they stopped and listened to each other a few times. but it was that conflict that overpowered.
i'm not entirely adverse to the idea of a riff-off in the context of gaze/drone vs. noir pop, but the truth is that neither had the chops to do it. the violin parts often just fizzled out into static feedback loops or two note patterns, and flopped on the builds. and the keyboard player often cycled around simple progressions, bent entirely on rooting herself in dynamics that were being completely paved over by the electronics.
the lack of footage was a conscious choice.
--
it was the material on valley hush' bandcamp page that drew me out (and made the smoking night worthwhile). While certainly pop, and maybe operating somewhere close to a successful and critically acclaimed contemporary act like tune yards, the overall songwriting struck me as worth documenting.
i only film one song and tend to pull it from between the second and fourth track. there's always the nightmare that you screw up the first track, which is also often going to be chosen to let the scragglers in. two-four is usually the meat of the set.
i pulled the third track, which meant i got one of the poppier numbers. overall, the set was a bit more developed than this, with more extended tracks that leaned into the realm of psychedelic rock without really falling into it.
it's pop. i know not everybody likes pop. i actually have a pretty hefty soft spot for it. but, realize i'm very picky about it, too. i'm only going to bite at a pop band if it's a really good one.
the show was late, as expected, but far more so than i realized. the last band was slotted for 11:15 - meaning they should have been done around 11:45. i knew it was later than that, but wasn't checking the time. the show wasn't done until 12:40; i would have guessed it was more like 12:15. but, had i been checking the clock more closely, i would have left a few minutes earlier.
while i do believe i got to rosa parks on time and should have been able to cut the bus off at the pass, i ended up missing it (unless it came out of customs well after 2:00, which is unlikely) by what could not have been more than a few minutes. i can only understand how this could happen by concluding that the bus left early.
you can imagine why this should not happen. there's more on this topic in the day's vlog:
http://dghjdfsghkrdghdgja.appspot.com/categories/shows/2015/11/20.html
Saturday, November 21, 2015
20-11-2015: why the detroit/windsor area needs a pedestrian crossing option
concert footage:
river spirit: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=btunBJsfq38
the creepers: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ZforNU_VKY (old footage)
nudie suits (none taken)
valley hush: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VmU8iOhObz8
review:
http://dghjdfsghkrdghdgja.appspot.com/categories/shows/2015/11/20.html
river spirit: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=btunBJsfq38
the creepers: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ZforNU_VKY (old footage)
nudie suits (none taken)
valley hush: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VmU8iOhObz8
review:
http://dghjdfsghkrdghdgja.appspot.com/categories/shows/2015/11/20.html
Friday, November 20, 2015
Wednesday, November 18, 2015
travelling to pontiac, michigan to see skinny puppy
if you're a really serious music fan, you can likely point to a handful of acts over the course of your life that have acted as epiphanies for you, that have really made you see the world differently. my list begins when i was pretty young and runs through a number of successful alternative rock bands [REM (89-91), nirvana (91-93), the smashing pumpkins (93-95), nine inch nails (94-96)] before absolutely plateauing with skinny puppy, over about 96-99. the next thing that slapped me upside the head was gybe's moya in early '99. but, skinny puppy were the band as i was going through the portal of mid adolescence and entering into adulthood. before puppy, music was formative; after puppy, it was more of a process of identification. it's very much the pivot point between when i was figuring out who i was and when i was pretty sure i knew who i was. as such, there's quite a lot of this band in the core of my being - both musically speaking and ideologically speaking.
while i would have been too young to see them anywhere anyways, the reality is that skinny puppy did not exist during this period. they have toured sporadically since 2000, but i had yet to have an opportunity to see them until now. so, this show was sort of a big deal for me.
they had a guitarist and a drummer with them and consequently focused the setlist around this. this meant that the material was largely from records like rabies and the process, which feature more prominent guitar work than some of the other records. while this is only one facet of a band that has several facets, one can only facilitate so many facets at one time. i'd have loved to sit there for six hours as they ran through everything they ever did, and maybe the odd tear garden & download tune, but that's not reasonable. the truth is that focusing on the drums/guitar aspect is maximizing their appeal as a live rock band, and that's perfectly understandable. it would have maybe been nice to see something like the center bullet, circustance or jackhammer mixed up in there somewhere, but i had a great time nonetheless.
here is an actual complete show:
it's less that the show was over earlier than i expected and more that it started earlier than i expected. it was doors at 7:00, and the band was on some time around 9:00. they actually played for close to two hours. but, the bar closed down and started pushing people out around 11:00, which left me stuck outside in pontiac for five and a half hours. if they had come on at 11:00 and finished around 1:00, as i was expecting, and then left the bar open until at least 2:30, maybe pushing 3:00, i would have only really needed to procrastinate for about an hour.
as it is, i hung around outside for a bit, went to a gay bar for a few hours and then just hung out with some random kids sitting around smoking in the parking lot. i was starting to freeze over by the time the bus finally showed up, and ready to collapse when i finally got back to canada at about 7:00 am.
http://dghjdfsghkrdghdgja.appspot.com/categories/shows/2015/11/15.html
while i would have been too young to see them anywhere anyways, the reality is that skinny puppy did not exist during this period. they have toured sporadically since 2000, but i had yet to have an opportunity to see them until now. so, this show was sort of a big deal for me.
they had a guitarist and a drummer with them and consequently focused the setlist around this. this meant that the material was largely from records like rabies and the process, which feature more prominent guitar work than some of the other records. while this is only one facet of a band that has several facets, one can only facilitate so many facets at one time. i'd have loved to sit there for six hours as they ran through everything they ever did, and maybe the odd tear garden & download tune, but that's not reasonable. the truth is that focusing on the drums/guitar aspect is maximizing their appeal as a live rock band, and that's perfectly understandable. it would have maybe been nice to see something like the center bullet, circustance or jackhammer mixed up in there somewhere, but i had a great time nonetheless.
here is an actual complete show:
it's less that the show was over earlier than i expected and more that it started earlier than i expected. it was doors at 7:00, and the band was on some time around 9:00. they actually played for close to two hours. but, the bar closed down and started pushing people out around 11:00, which left me stuck outside in pontiac for five and a half hours. if they had come on at 11:00 and finished around 1:00, as i was expecting, and then left the bar open until at least 2:30, maybe pushing 3:00, i would have only really needed to procrastinate for about an hour.
as it is, i hung around outside for a bit, went to a gay bar for a few hours and then just hung out with some random kids sitting around smoking in the parking lot. i was starting to freeze over by the time the bus finally showed up, and ready to collapse when i finally got back to canada at about 7:00 am.
http://dghjdfsghkrdghdgja.appspot.com/categories/shows/2015/11/15.html
vampire belt & absinthe bust
attending this concert was a last minute decision that i played over in my mind repeatedly. did i really want to go? was it worth the walk? customs? should i stay in and work instead?
i decided to go because i wasn't going to get any meaningful mixing done that night anyways and i felt it should be in the list of shows i've seen. i also decided that i had an obligation to stop by at the christopher bissonnette release party in windsor because release parties for kranky artists don't happen in windsor every day. so, the plan was to stop at the release show for a few minutes, see what it was about and probably catch the 9:30 bus across to detroit. i was expecting to miss the opening act, and maybe some of the second set.
when i got to the release show, i noticed something i hadn't seen before: this bar sells absinthe. i'll acknowledge that my understanding of absinthe was somewhat vague. well, it's not necessary working knowledge on a day-to-day basis, right? i'd heard it was a hallucinogen. i hadn't really looked it up, because i hadn't really been in the opportunity to need to know about it. but, i figure i'm standing in the bar, i should try it...
i asked the bartender what, in hindsight, seem like ridiculous questions.
"i've never done absinthe before, but i've done plenty of mushrooms..."
"....will i be ok to go through customs on the stuff?"
i decide that i'll take a "strong" shot and see how i feel. by the time i'm done, it's clear to me that the release party is just a dj set (which is not my thing....), so i'm out to the noise show.
i must have missed the bus by three minutes; i'm stuck waiting for the 10:00 bus. but, i'm thinking i still have plenty of time to get there, because they'll be on third.
as i'm waiting, i can feel the burn of the vodka, but i'm not feeling any hallucinogenic effects. i do start to feel some waves as i'm walking up gratiot, but they're gone by the time i get to trinosophes....
...where the band is halfway through their set. they played second. fuckers...
i did catch about twenty minutes of what i'm guessing was probably a 30-40 minute set, and the above shot of noise is a decent representation of it. i mean, it's exactly what one would expect, whether they are familiar with vampire belt or merely with corsano and/or nace. it's just raw, unsculpted, jagged sound.
some people were complaining after the show. "that was fucking terrible", one person said. i had to agree, actually. but, see, that's the point. i guess there's a sort of least upper bound on noise, where you don't get more offensive with increasing intensity. this was achieved some time in the 90s; it really hasn't evolved much since. however extreme extreme music gets in the upcoming decades, what the collection of mostly east coast bands that sound similar to vampire belt did then, do now and will do in the future will never lose it's edge in the realm of irritating the uninitiated. it's just past the limit. some people claim it's the most pure form of contemporary punk; i think that this idea is absolute fucking bollocks, but the sentiment has something to it in the sense that it's a "fuck you" that will never lose it's sting. so, you go to the show expecting to enjoy a half hour of absolutely incoherent nonsense. at the same time, you expect that almost nobody else in the audience will enjoy it.
here's a full set, if you dare:
i stayed a few minutes into the next act, mostly because my stomach was hurting from the absinthe, but left fairly briefly in order to go get another shot. understand that i'm still operating under the idea that this is a hallucinogen. i'm feeling like i didn't get enough to get to a peak and need to take another shot before i can come to any conclusions on the value of the drug. the act was mixing horns with theremins; you've heard this before, and you weren't excited when you did.
i didn't even get a vodka buzz off of the second shot. it was just entirely unfelt.
it wasn't until i woke up in the morning that i realized i was operating on bad information. it turns out that absinthe has a chemical called thujone in it that can cause muscle spasms at high doses but is not hallucinogenic. that is, absinthe does not have hallucinogenic properties. it's really just very potent alcohol.
oops.
vlog for the day:
http://dghjdfsghkrdghdgja.appspot.com/categories/shows/2015/11/14.html
i decided to go because i wasn't going to get any meaningful mixing done that night anyways and i felt it should be in the list of shows i've seen. i also decided that i had an obligation to stop by at the christopher bissonnette release party in windsor because release parties for kranky artists don't happen in windsor every day. so, the plan was to stop at the release show for a few minutes, see what it was about and probably catch the 9:30 bus across to detroit. i was expecting to miss the opening act, and maybe some of the second set.
when i got to the release show, i noticed something i hadn't seen before: this bar sells absinthe. i'll acknowledge that my understanding of absinthe was somewhat vague. well, it's not necessary working knowledge on a day-to-day basis, right? i'd heard it was a hallucinogen. i hadn't really looked it up, because i hadn't really been in the opportunity to need to know about it. but, i figure i'm standing in the bar, i should try it...
i asked the bartender what, in hindsight, seem like ridiculous questions.
"i've never done absinthe before, but i've done plenty of mushrooms..."
"....will i be ok to go through customs on the stuff?"
i decide that i'll take a "strong" shot and see how i feel. by the time i'm done, it's clear to me that the release party is just a dj set (which is not my thing....), so i'm out to the noise show.
i must have missed the bus by three minutes; i'm stuck waiting for the 10:00 bus. but, i'm thinking i still have plenty of time to get there, because they'll be on third.
as i'm waiting, i can feel the burn of the vodka, but i'm not feeling any hallucinogenic effects. i do start to feel some waves as i'm walking up gratiot, but they're gone by the time i get to trinosophes....
...where the band is halfway through their set. they played second. fuckers...
i did catch about twenty minutes of what i'm guessing was probably a 30-40 minute set, and the above shot of noise is a decent representation of it. i mean, it's exactly what one would expect, whether they are familiar with vampire belt or merely with corsano and/or nace. it's just raw, unsculpted, jagged sound.
some people were complaining after the show. "that was fucking terrible", one person said. i had to agree, actually. but, see, that's the point. i guess there's a sort of least upper bound on noise, where you don't get more offensive with increasing intensity. this was achieved some time in the 90s; it really hasn't evolved much since. however extreme extreme music gets in the upcoming decades, what the collection of mostly east coast bands that sound similar to vampire belt did then, do now and will do in the future will never lose it's edge in the realm of irritating the uninitiated. it's just past the limit. some people claim it's the most pure form of contemporary punk; i think that this idea is absolute fucking bollocks, but the sentiment has something to it in the sense that it's a "fuck you" that will never lose it's sting. so, you go to the show expecting to enjoy a half hour of absolutely incoherent nonsense. at the same time, you expect that almost nobody else in the audience will enjoy it.
here's a full set, if you dare:
i stayed a few minutes into the next act, mostly because my stomach was hurting from the absinthe, but left fairly briefly in order to go get another shot. understand that i'm still operating under the idea that this is a hallucinogen. i'm feeling like i didn't get enough to get to a peak and need to take another shot before i can come to any conclusions on the value of the drug. the act was mixing horns with theremins; you've heard this before, and you weren't excited when you did.
i didn't even get a vodka buzz off of the second shot. it was just entirely unfelt.
it wasn't until i woke up in the morning that i realized i was operating on bad information. it turns out that absinthe has a chemical called thujone in it that can cause muscle spasms at high doses but is not hallucinogenic. that is, absinthe does not have hallucinogenic properties. it's really just very potent alcohol.
oops.
vlog for the day:
http://dghjdfsghkrdghdgja.appspot.com/categories/shows/2015/11/14.html
Tuesday, November 17, 2015
Monday, November 16, 2015
Sunday, November 15, 2015
14-11-2015: vampire belt & absinthe bust
concert footage:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xCI5CRdMB4c
review:
http://dghjdfsghkrdghdgja.appspot.com/categories/shows/2015/11/14.html
i seem to have been taken in on an urban legend regarding the absinthe....
"Absinthe has been frequently and improperly described in modern times as being hallucinogenic. No peer-reviewed scientific study has demonstrated absinthe to possess hallucinogenic properties."
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Absinthe#Effects
that would explain why i didn't feel anything. the initial waves may have been psychosomatic and a consequence of expectation.
also note that i had to reupload this video to remove an approximately one minute section (beginning around 18:40) where the bar i was walking by happened to be playing a michael jackson song. sony claimed copyright over the entire vlog, the right to place ads of it's choosing on it and total control over revenue to those ads. to put it mildly, this is absolute bullshit. i have no intention of profiting directly from these vlogs (please visit my bandcamp site to support me financially), but the idea that i'd be allowing sony to profit from it because the bar i was walking by for forty seconds was playing a michael jackson song makes me want to vomit.
in order to prevent these kinds of absolutely frivolous claims, youtube should have an independent arbitration process in place that takes power away from claimants and puts it in the hand of a neutral third party.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xCI5CRdMB4c
review:
http://dghjdfsghkrdghdgja.appspot.com/categories/shows/2015/11/14.html
i seem to have been taken in on an urban legend regarding the absinthe....
"Absinthe has been frequently and improperly described in modern times as being hallucinogenic. No peer-reviewed scientific study has demonstrated absinthe to possess hallucinogenic properties."
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Absinthe#Effects
that would explain why i didn't feel anything. the initial waves may have been psychosomatic and a consequence of expectation.
also note that i had to reupload this video to remove an approximately one minute section (beginning around 18:40) where the bar i was walking by happened to be playing a michael jackson song. sony claimed copyright over the entire vlog, the right to place ads of it's choosing on it and total control over revenue to those ads. to put it mildly, this is absolute bullshit. i have no intention of profiting directly from these vlogs (please visit my bandcamp site to support me financially), but the idea that i'd be allowing sony to profit from it because the bar i was walking by for forty seconds was playing a michael jackson song makes me want to vomit.
in order to prevent these kinds of absolutely frivolous claims, youtube should have an independent arbitration process in place that takes power away from claimants and puts it in the hand of a neutral third party.
Saturday, November 14, 2015
Sunday, November 8, 2015
an early show in ferndale on a cool november evening
going to ferndale for a show is always somewhat of an adventure. it's a 40 minute bus ride from the tunnel, which means it's a 40 minute bus ride back, and the last tunnel bus is far too early - it's at 1:09, which isn't even after last call. that means the show would have to end by 11:30 to get back, and that had yet to happen. i can understand why they don't want to run all night, but they should run until at least 2:15 to give people a chance to get back from right downtown around last call. the thing is this: i'm not going to take a 40 minute bus ride out to ferndale and then leave early to catch the bus. if i'm going to go that far, i'm going to stay for what i'm there for, even if it means having to wait until the morning to get home. but, tonight i went specifically to see the opening band, and so expected to get home by leaving halfway through the headliner. as it happened, the headliner was done by a quarter after eleven, so i got to see the whole show and then get home. but, i shouldn't get used to that.
i was perusing the gear on stage, and just about ready to take some camera shots of it, when pinkish black came on a little earlier than i expected - pretty much 9:00 sharp. the set was exactly an hour, too. no sound check, and that was decisive. i started off a foot from the drummer, dead center, but realized quickly that the bass was coming straight at me and i'd need to move a little bit away to avoid the mic in the camera from distorting. so, that's why i shifted to where the camera shot is. but, i went back to the place i started at after i got my shot in and spent the rest of the show there.
the set was interesting, but i'm not sure exactly what to make of it. i spoke to the band after the set, and they acknowledged the mix was poor - that the synths and vocals were not loud enough to compete with the drums. but, it seemed to me that what was coming at me was more than just a mix issue. i'm fairly familiar with their previous work, and it really seemed like the drumming in the tunes had evolved dramatically in ways that often seemed rather off kilter. in multiple spots in the show, the drums fell into what were simple patterns that were punctuated by strange dynamics in volume and syncopation. overall, that converted the aesthetic from the claustrophobic pop sound that they're known for into something more schizophrenic that brought to mind acts like swans and skinny puppy.
because i'm familiar with the material, it kind of threw me a bit but i can't say i didn't enjoy it. what i'm just not clear on is whether turning the synths down focused more attention on the nature of the drumming, whether the songs have evolved over several years and this is some indication of where they're pivoting to or whether it was even just a tactic to compensate for the low volume on the synths (i.e. that the drummer couldn't really hear what was happening, and had to adjust). regardless, it certainly made the sound a bit more raw in converting the material out of headphone music and into something more live. they're worth checking out, but maybe don't expect the tracks to sound the same way they do on record.
here's a full set:
i got to see zombi as well, but i really wasn't expecting a lot from the set and wasn't particularly impressed by it. so, at least i wasn't let down - but i wasn't turned around, either. i'll give the drummer credit on the basis of pure talent even if a lot of it was derivative - it was easy to tell when he was trying to sound like phil collins or trying to sound like neal peart. but, the songwriting was mostly limp and repetitive post-rock, punctuated only by horrifically cheesy delves into the worst kinds of 70s prog. i'm a fan of the more creative sides of both of these genres, but the way they mix it up is just about the worst formula possible. i mean, tortoise spliced with floyd, or gybe! spliced with genesis, sounds like a great idea. that's awesome*awesome, which would have to compute to awesome. but, yes spliced with and so i watch you from afar is cheese spliced with cheese, and could only possibly produce cheese.
for example, there was one track where the drummer was playing something very reminiscent of a trick of the tail era collins (see: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TBcnjx05a1s), while the bassist/synth guy was moping out a two chord minor progression. i may have been heard thinking out loud that it sounded like what phil collins must have felt like the day that his dog died, which is not the thing of compelling music. there was another track where the drummer was literally playing the pattern to tom sawyer, while the synth guy did some kind of slow motion krautrock thing. i may have been heard thinking out loud that this was the chapter twain could never get published, where tom got baked and passed out near the creek.
silliness aside, they were also very tense. when people yelled in excitement "keep it going!", they defensively pointed out that it's only the second set of the show. i mean, shit. imagine somebody getting excited to see their favourite band at a show. clearly disrespectful!
but, i think that serves to explain what's wrong, here. these guys need to chill out a little. if they were to breathe a little, maybe the song structures would open up a bit, which would lead them to more compelling arrangements. it may not be sufficient, but i claim it is a necessary condition to get them to turn the corner on what they're doing.
vlog for the day is here:
http://dghjdfsghkrdghdgja.appspot.com/categories/shows/2015/11/06.html
i was perusing the gear on stage, and just about ready to take some camera shots of it, when pinkish black came on a little earlier than i expected - pretty much 9:00 sharp. the set was exactly an hour, too. no sound check, and that was decisive. i started off a foot from the drummer, dead center, but realized quickly that the bass was coming straight at me and i'd need to move a little bit away to avoid the mic in the camera from distorting. so, that's why i shifted to where the camera shot is. but, i went back to the place i started at after i got my shot in and spent the rest of the show there.
the set was interesting, but i'm not sure exactly what to make of it. i spoke to the band after the set, and they acknowledged the mix was poor - that the synths and vocals were not loud enough to compete with the drums. but, it seemed to me that what was coming at me was more than just a mix issue. i'm fairly familiar with their previous work, and it really seemed like the drumming in the tunes had evolved dramatically in ways that often seemed rather off kilter. in multiple spots in the show, the drums fell into what were simple patterns that were punctuated by strange dynamics in volume and syncopation. overall, that converted the aesthetic from the claustrophobic pop sound that they're known for into something more schizophrenic that brought to mind acts like swans and skinny puppy.
because i'm familiar with the material, it kind of threw me a bit but i can't say i didn't enjoy it. what i'm just not clear on is whether turning the synths down focused more attention on the nature of the drumming, whether the songs have evolved over several years and this is some indication of where they're pivoting to or whether it was even just a tactic to compensate for the low volume on the synths (i.e. that the drummer couldn't really hear what was happening, and had to adjust). regardless, it certainly made the sound a bit more raw in converting the material out of headphone music and into something more live. they're worth checking out, but maybe don't expect the tracks to sound the same way they do on record.
here's a full set:
i got to see zombi as well, but i really wasn't expecting a lot from the set and wasn't particularly impressed by it. so, at least i wasn't let down - but i wasn't turned around, either. i'll give the drummer credit on the basis of pure talent even if a lot of it was derivative - it was easy to tell when he was trying to sound like phil collins or trying to sound like neal peart. but, the songwriting was mostly limp and repetitive post-rock, punctuated only by horrifically cheesy delves into the worst kinds of 70s prog. i'm a fan of the more creative sides of both of these genres, but the way they mix it up is just about the worst formula possible. i mean, tortoise spliced with floyd, or gybe! spliced with genesis, sounds like a great idea. that's awesome*awesome, which would have to compute to awesome. but, yes spliced with and so i watch you from afar is cheese spliced with cheese, and could only possibly produce cheese.
for example, there was one track where the drummer was playing something very reminiscent of a trick of the tail era collins (see: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TBcnjx05a1s), while the bassist/synth guy was moping out a two chord minor progression. i may have been heard thinking out loud that it sounded like what phil collins must have felt like the day that his dog died, which is not the thing of compelling music. there was another track where the drummer was literally playing the pattern to tom sawyer, while the synth guy did some kind of slow motion krautrock thing. i may have been heard thinking out loud that this was the chapter twain could never get published, where tom got baked and passed out near the creek.
silliness aside, they were also very tense. when people yelled in excitement "keep it going!", they defensively pointed out that it's only the second set of the show. i mean, shit. imagine somebody getting excited to see their favourite band at a show. clearly disrespectful!
but, i think that serves to explain what's wrong, here. these guys need to chill out a little. if they were to breathe a little, maybe the song structures would open up a bit, which would lead them to more compelling arrangements. it may not be sufficient, but i claim it is a necessary condition to get them to turn the corner on what they're doing.
vlog for the day is here:
http://dghjdfsghkrdghdgja.appspot.com/categories/shows/2015/11/06.html
Saturday, November 7, 2015
Friday, November 6, 2015
Friday, October 30, 2015
it really was a treat to sit a few feet from jimmy chamberlain, and watch him play
i caught a jazz band in detroit last night that included jimmy chamberlain. i was expecting percy jones in the band, but he wasn't there.
my reviews tend to focus more around scenarios, and leave actual analyses to one-line statements. the band was kind of lackluster, really, but i enjoyed the show enough anyways (for other reasons) that i'm glad i went.
but, the narrative last night had mostly to do with the camera, and the truth is that i've already stated everything on camera that i would normally type in a review of this sort. rather than repeat myself, i'll post the vlog.
i doubt that this will be the new normal. in fact, i expect that i'll start writing reviews before i post vlogs to ensure that it isn't - i like writing these reviews. but, for tonight, because that's entirely where my head was, that's what i have - and i don't see the use in writing out what i have on film.
vlog:
concert footage:
this is a late review, but i'm adding it to ensure i continue with it. i have a large collection of reviews, now, and don't want to have this fall into disrepair.
i hadn't been to this venue previously, and had forgotten to write down the address; i knew it was on a sidestreet behind woodward, between the park and the fox, so i just turned left blindly - and luckily found it very quickly.
it was no more than fifteen minutes past doors; it seems as though they started immediately. this might be cultural. i mean, does the opera say "doors at 8", then wait until 9:00? or is it on at 8:00 sharp? i can't say; i've never been. i'm just so used to "doors at 8 and the opening act some time around 9" that it didn't even cross my mind that the time on the ticket may have been a start time.
so, i paid my entrance and walked up near the stage. this venue was a restaurant, and a fairly nice one, so it had servers moving food out to tables and no space at the front. there was a bar stool with a good view a little to the right of the stage.
i get a tap on my shoulder...
"what can i get you?"
"that depends. do you have cheap beer?"
"$3 pbr."
"yeah, that's good."
the first set laid down the tone, which was that we're mostly in for some jamming for the night. there were some standards, but most of what got played was based around solo parts and cycled around. the piano played a solo, then the bass played a solo, then the sax played a solo and then sometimes the drums did a solo. this basic formula was followed by almost every song that wasn't a standard.
i noticed something in the intermission. there's a guy standing right in front of me, with something in his ear. i had to say something...
"dude. is that a j in your ear?"
he laughs.
"no. it's just a cigarette with the top twisted."
"k. 'cause, i was thinking you probably forgot it there and should put it away."
he laughs again.
"hey, want to take a walk out front?"
so, the second set had a hazier, looser feel to it - this is jazz after all, and i was channeling satan after the excursion outside. jimmy seemed to relax a little in the second set, when he realized he was mostly playing for old pumpkins fans rather than stuffy bourgeois jazz people. the hooting and a hollering may have been frowned upon by the bar, but he definitely fed off of it in terms of dynamics. i explain this at the end of the vlog.
walking back to the bus stop was a little strange, as i remember this feeling of avoiding being run down. every car was in on it and needed to be avoided. a kind of game of paranoid gta, in real life.
i get on the bus, and hear it from the driver.
"you're baked."
i shrug.
no problems getting through customs. and, frankly, there shouldn't have been problems, either.
here is a full set:
http://dghjdfsghkrdghdgja.appspot.com/categories/shows/2015/10/29.html
my reviews tend to focus more around scenarios, and leave actual analyses to one-line statements. the band was kind of lackluster, really, but i enjoyed the show enough anyways (for other reasons) that i'm glad i went.
but, the narrative last night had mostly to do with the camera, and the truth is that i've already stated everything on camera that i would normally type in a review of this sort. rather than repeat myself, i'll post the vlog.
i doubt that this will be the new normal. in fact, i expect that i'll start writing reviews before i post vlogs to ensure that it isn't - i like writing these reviews. but, for tonight, because that's entirely where my head was, that's what i have - and i don't see the use in writing out what i have on film.
vlog:
concert footage:
i hadn't been to this venue previously, and had forgotten to write down the address; i knew it was on a sidestreet behind woodward, between the park and the fox, so i just turned left blindly - and luckily found it very quickly.
it was no more than fifteen minutes past doors; it seems as though they started immediately. this might be cultural. i mean, does the opera say "doors at 8", then wait until 9:00? or is it on at 8:00 sharp? i can't say; i've never been. i'm just so used to "doors at 8 and the opening act some time around 9" that it didn't even cross my mind that the time on the ticket may have been a start time.
so, i paid my entrance and walked up near the stage. this venue was a restaurant, and a fairly nice one, so it had servers moving food out to tables and no space at the front. there was a bar stool with a good view a little to the right of the stage.
i get a tap on my shoulder...
"what can i get you?"
"that depends. do you have cheap beer?"
"$3 pbr."
"yeah, that's good."
the first set laid down the tone, which was that we're mostly in for some jamming for the night. there were some standards, but most of what got played was based around solo parts and cycled around. the piano played a solo, then the bass played a solo, then the sax played a solo and then sometimes the drums did a solo. this basic formula was followed by almost every song that wasn't a standard.
i noticed something in the intermission. there's a guy standing right in front of me, with something in his ear. i had to say something...
"dude. is that a j in your ear?"
he laughs.
"no. it's just a cigarette with the top twisted."
"k. 'cause, i was thinking you probably forgot it there and should put it away."
he laughs again.
"hey, want to take a walk out front?"
so, the second set had a hazier, looser feel to it - this is jazz after all, and i was channeling satan after the excursion outside. jimmy seemed to relax a little in the second set, when he realized he was mostly playing for old pumpkins fans rather than stuffy bourgeois jazz people. the hooting and a hollering may have been frowned upon by the bar, but he definitely fed off of it in terms of dynamics. i explain this at the end of the vlog.
walking back to the bus stop was a little strange, as i remember this feeling of avoiding being run down. every car was in on it and needed to be avoided. a kind of game of paranoid gta, in real life.
i get on the bus, and hear it from the driver.
"you're baked."
i shrug.
no problems getting through customs. and, frankly, there shouldn't have been problems, either.
here is a full set:
http://dghjdfsghkrdghdgja.appspot.com/categories/shows/2015/10/29.html
Thursday, October 29, 2015
Sunday, October 25, 2015
first vlog (24-10-2015: introductions)
i allowed youtube to "fix" the shake, and it made a mess, so i've reuploaded this.
i won't post these here daily. if you want to follow it, follow it on youtube.
well, i blew the day learning how to edit videos. it should be a faster process, moving forward. it turned out to be fairly intuitive. but, it was also a learning process regarding a few things. the camera jitter was more than i expected; it turns out there's an easy fix ("stabilize"), but i should be more aware of it. also, i recorded today at 320p because i wanted to conserve memory card space on the way to the store to get a bigger card, and i don't think it's quite good enough. exposure in the basement is bad, but it turns out i can fix it in editing. the audio on the device is fine. all in all, i think i can work quite well with this device. today's upload is going to look pretty amateur, but hopefully that will resolve itself in a few days.
this is really just an introduction, i'm just laying down the setting.
https://jasonparent.bandcamp.com
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Myu96jS68ZE
i won't post these here daily. if you want to follow it, follow it on youtube.
well, i blew the day learning how to edit videos. it should be a faster process, moving forward. it turned out to be fairly intuitive. but, it was also a learning process regarding a few things. the camera jitter was more than i expected; it turns out there's an easy fix ("stabilize"), but i should be more aware of it. also, i recorded today at 320p because i wanted to conserve memory card space on the way to the store to get a bigger card, and i don't think it's quite good enough. exposure in the basement is bad, but it turns out i can fix it in editing. the audio on the device is fine. all in all, i think i can work quite well with this device. today's upload is going to look pretty amateur, but hopefully that will resolve itself in a few days.
this is really just an introduction, i'm just laying down the setting.
https://jasonparent.bandcamp.com
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Myu96jS68ZE
Friday, October 23, 2015
camera came in today.
it works, at least. maybe not so well. lol. well, there's lots of settings to play with....
i'll take it out tomorrow, to start.
it seems to be the plug, but i'm not done testing yet.
it got better when i set the exposure, but it seems to require a lot of the light for the video part. it's going to require a few experiments, clearly.
it's giving me about an hour on the 2 gb card. i'm going to want five or six hours, at least, so one of the things i'll do tomorrow is get a new card....
it works, at least. maybe not so well. lol. well, there's lots of settings to play with....
i'll take it out tomorrow, to start.
it seems to be the plug, but i'm not done testing yet.
it got better when i set the exposure, but it seems to require a lot of the light for the video part. it's going to require a few experiments, clearly.
it's giving me about an hour on the 2 gb card. i'm going to want five or six hours, at least, so one of the things i'll do tomorrow is get a new card....
Tuesday, October 20, 2015
appointment
jessica
first, i should apologize for sending you faxes and emails; i don't have a phone.
my name is jessica parent. i saw you about a year ago regarding transgender hrt. you carried on a prescription i had been on for four years and have now been on for five years. at the time, we agreed that you would continue to prescribe the hormones from a distance, because i live in windsor and it's very difficult for me to commute to london. however, when i went to renew the prescription, the pharmacy received back a note that you need to see me.
i really can't afford to make the commute. i'm really not quite sure why it is that you need to see me, given that we agreed it was unnecessary. do you need a blood test? could you schedule one at a clinic here in windsor, and have the results faxed to you?
i'm exploring further options, here, but they're kind of bleak. i have an appointment with a family doctor on nov 17, and i'm hoping that works out. i'm also communicating with an endocrinologist, but he's put a condition down to attend a workshop in toronto with a year-long waiting list, and that's kind of a non-starter. i may be able to convince him to waive this, but it's up in the air right now.
if it's just a blood test, i can do that. but i would really like to avoid the bus fare; i could do it, if it's my only choice, but i live on odsp and it's going to be tight up against my budget.
if you require regular visits, i suppose i understand. i think i've been on hormones so long, that it's just a question of a check-up, and i do feel healthy enough that i think it's probably superfluous, but i realize there are due diligence issues, as well. but, i can't commit to that.
in the short run, i'm hoping maybe you could give me another 3-6 months to allow me to exhaust options here. again: if it's just a blood test, i'm more than willing to do that. if not, and you're ok with another few months, i'd ask you to let me know so i can ask the pharmacy to fax another request.
i know this is not ideal. *i'm* the one that's struggling to find a doctor, here, that's at a reasonable distance. i'm not quite sure why this is proving so difficult. but, it's obviously kind of frightening to come up against the idea of not being able to find hormones, after already transition fully for all functional purposes. i hope that the urgency is understood and the difficult situation is accounted for in your decision.
london clinic
Good morning Jessica,
Thanks so much for your email. We can absolutely empathize with the difficulty to get here for an appointment with the distance and financial constraints. I showed Dr. Martin your email and he came up with a bit of a compromise, I hope this can work. He has agreed to extend the prescriptions until June but in the meantime, if you could find a way to make it up here for an appointment that would be very important before we are able to give more beyond this date. The issue is just with the due diligence, for him to be able to be accountable and act in a medically responsible way while prescribing medications it is essential that we see you in our office for follow-ups. Hopefully the extension will make it a little easier to find a way to get here at some point between now and then. Let me know that you would be agreeable to this plan and where you would like me to send the refill for you medications. If there is anything else I can do to help, don’t hesitate to let me know.
jessica
probably the easiest thing to do would be for me to fax the refill request from the pharmacy. does that work for you?
extending it to june will give me more than enough time to figure things out here, so that is ideal: thank you. i will know if i need to make another appointment within a few weeks, and if i do i will call you near the end of november to make it. if i don't, i'll let you know as well.
london clinic
Hi Jessica,
I'm so glad to hear this plan will work. You can for sure have the pharmacy fax over the refill requests and I will fill it out and fax it back to them :)
first, i should apologize for sending you faxes and emails; i don't have a phone.
my name is jessica parent. i saw you about a year ago regarding transgender hrt. you carried on a prescription i had been on for four years and have now been on for five years. at the time, we agreed that you would continue to prescribe the hormones from a distance, because i live in windsor and it's very difficult for me to commute to london. however, when i went to renew the prescription, the pharmacy received back a note that you need to see me.
i really can't afford to make the commute. i'm really not quite sure why it is that you need to see me, given that we agreed it was unnecessary. do you need a blood test? could you schedule one at a clinic here in windsor, and have the results faxed to you?
i'm exploring further options, here, but they're kind of bleak. i have an appointment with a family doctor on nov 17, and i'm hoping that works out. i'm also communicating with an endocrinologist, but he's put a condition down to attend a workshop in toronto with a year-long waiting list, and that's kind of a non-starter. i may be able to convince him to waive this, but it's up in the air right now.
if it's just a blood test, i can do that. but i would really like to avoid the bus fare; i could do it, if it's my only choice, but i live on odsp and it's going to be tight up against my budget.
if you require regular visits, i suppose i understand. i think i've been on hormones so long, that it's just a question of a check-up, and i do feel healthy enough that i think it's probably superfluous, but i realize there are due diligence issues, as well. but, i can't commit to that.
in the short run, i'm hoping maybe you could give me another 3-6 months to allow me to exhaust options here. again: if it's just a blood test, i'm more than willing to do that. if not, and you're ok with another few months, i'd ask you to let me know so i can ask the pharmacy to fax another request.
i know this is not ideal. *i'm* the one that's struggling to find a doctor, here, that's at a reasonable distance. i'm not quite sure why this is proving so difficult. but, it's obviously kind of frightening to come up against the idea of not being able to find hormones, after already transition fully for all functional purposes. i hope that the urgency is understood and the difficult situation is accounted for in your decision.
london clinic
Good morning Jessica,
Thanks so much for your email. We can absolutely empathize with the difficulty to get here for an appointment with the distance and financial constraints. I showed Dr. Martin your email and he came up with a bit of a compromise, I hope this can work. He has agreed to extend the prescriptions until June but in the meantime, if you could find a way to make it up here for an appointment that would be very important before we are able to give more beyond this date. The issue is just with the due diligence, for him to be able to be accountable and act in a medically responsible way while prescribing medications it is essential that we see you in our office for follow-ups. Hopefully the extension will make it a little easier to find a way to get here at some point between now and then. Let me know that you would be agreeable to this plan and where you would like me to send the refill for you medications. If there is anything else I can do to help, don’t hesitate to let me know.
jessica
probably the easiest thing to do would be for me to fax the refill request from the pharmacy. does that work for you?
extending it to june will give me more than enough time to figure things out here, so that is ideal: thank you. i will know if i need to make another appointment within a few weeks, and if i do i will call you near the end of november to make it. if i don't, i'll let you know as well.
london clinic
Hi Jessica,
I'm so glad to hear this plan will work. You can for sure have the pharmacy fax over the refill requests and I will fill it out and fax it back to them :)
Monday, October 19, 2015
so, why am i doing this? what are my motives? what are my goals?
the cynical assumption is no doubt that i'm looking to cash a check, but in fact i live very happily on disability and have no real incentives to generate income. i mean, i'm not going to turn it down if it comes. and, sure, i'll pay a little bit back. but i'm simply not desperately trying to charm myself out of wage slavery, because i'm actually not in it. i made a decision several years ago that i would not live under the goal of profit maximization; i've held to it fairly well to this point and i don't plan on reversing myself on it.
that's maybe something to grasp about me, overall: i need real motives, not just monetary ones. it's the dour existentialist in me that sees the society around me as disparagingly absurd. i just don't find capitalism motivational; this is the real reason that i have not been able to survive without state aid - i become hopelessly depressed and unable to function when forced to work to exist. i mean, look at how much writing i do for free. i'm rambling with an aim. i need that. methods to madness and whatnot. i don't even mirror with an ad space; and while i do plan to mirror, i don't plan to put ads up. call me a fool if you'd like, but understand that the feeling is mutual.
that said, i do plan to monetize these videos and that is a definite difference. i have not and will not monetize any of my music videos. i'm comfortable with monetizing this, so why not? but it's not a motive, so much as it's just possible gravy. i'm happy as i am, but could think of plenty of activist things to do with a larger stream of income.
the primary reason i'm doing this is to act as a gateway to the music. when i first put up my other youtube channel, i had no real expectations for it. but, i learned quickly that the commenting system could act as an effective means of promotion so long as i was consistently being interesting or provocative - which are things that i'm naturally good at. i found my hits growing relatively quickly, and on a fairly steep curve, as a consequence of posting insightful, witty and/or challenging comments on other people's videos - or, from time to time, just being a good troll.
over the last few months, youtube has taken steps to hurt "spammers". was i spammer? well, it depends. i was certainly advertising, but it was through the stealth approach of posing interesting questions rather than the obvious approach of pushing links in your face. i might suggest we're all better off for that and it's a kind of fair game type of spamming. but, purposefully or collaterally, i was caught up in the anti-spam shifts and have seen hits come down dramatically. as i understand that this is systemic, i realize i need to take further steps.
now, a vlog can only act as a frontend for something else if it is actually interesting, and can actually hold an audience, and the fact that i think i can do this is a big part of the point. on the one hand: merely look at my comments. look at the arguments, debates, discussions. i'm obviously able to generate interest. it's more than that.
i think the primary reason i'm of interest is that i can offer a worldview into a "real life" transgendered person. by that, what i mean is a lower class transgendered person that neither lives a celebrity lifestyle nor has had any plastic surgery. the media is complicit in this perpetual, brutal stereotyping of transwomen as these passive little barbified bimbos that spend their whole lives fantasizing about becoming porn stars. i don't wear fishnets. i don't have a boob job. i don't talk like rupaul. i'm really rather shockingly normal. i think that this kind of realness is what is missing from the conversation, because so many of us are so shy and so unwilling to draw attention to it. i can walk into this space fairly freely; i openly identify as specifically trans and will actually correct you if you suggest or imply otherwise. i have no social aspirations in either gender for this kind of open discussion to interfere with. hopefully, by presenting the perspective of a "normal" trans person, i can help break down stereotypes of the shallow, materialistic porn star or model wannabe transfemale. did you know that transgendered people are actually statistically of greater likelihood to be of above average intelligence? it's a condition that is actually correlated very strongly with bookishness, aloof intellectualism and sometimes crippling levels of introversion. very few of us want to be porn stars. most of us would prefer to spend a saturday night in the library than at the club.
the second reason is that i often find myself walking over long distances and mentally putting aside thoughts to write down somewhere later. as i spend a lot of time walking, i spend a lot of time thinking. i think some of these thoughts are worth sharing. this goes back to the same political motives i have in ranting everywhere. i suppose this is more of the traditional vlog, right: the webcam in the bedroom. but, i won't do that. if i'm at home, i'd actually prefer to write it down - i think more fluidly when i'm typing. rather, a substantial part of this blog is going to be me talking into the camera as i'm walking around in the wee hours of the morning, ejecting scattered thoughts and various insights.
that brings up another point: i'm a single person. this is by choice, by desire and without any reservations. i couldn't imagine not being single. but, what that means is that this is an exercise in introversion, rather than a display of social behaviour. as an outlet, that might be healthy, for me.
i also think it will be good for me to need to have a greater incentive to focus on how i present myself. as i'm single, and live on disability, i can go through rather long periods of personal neglect. if i need to be on screen every day, or every other day, that is going to make a big difference in how i treat myself, which will have consequences in terms of self-esteem. i think this will be good for me.
so, these are the social and personal goals i have in running a vlog. they may not always be obvious, as you're following me to a concert or watching me make lunch. but, i hope that i'm able to use this vlog both to build awareness and to help myself deal with various issues - as well as to draw attention to myself as a working artist.
https://plus.google.com/u/0/b/108929126523080872678/108929126523080872678/posts/fHiPrp3Rwd8
the cynical assumption is no doubt that i'm looking to cash a check, but in fact i live very happily on disability and have no real incentives to generate income. i mean, i'm not going to turn it down if it comes. and, sure, i'll pay a little bit back. but i'm simply not desperately trying to charm myself out of wage slavery, because i'm actually not in it. i made a decision several years ago that i would not live under the goal of profit maximization; i've held to it fairly well to this point and i don't plan on reversing myself on it.
that's maybe something to grasp about me, overall: i need real motives, not just monetary ones. it's the dour existentialist in me that sees the society around me as disparagingly absurd. i just don't find capitalism motivational; this is the real reason that i have not been able to survive without state aid - i become hopelessly depressed and unable to function when forced to work to exist. i mean, look at how much writing i do for free. i'm rambling with an aim. i need that. methods to madness and whatnot. i don't even mirror with an ad space; and while i do plan to mirror, i don't plan to put ads up. call me a fool if you'd like, but understand that the feeling is mutual.
that said, i do plan to monetize these videos and that is a definite difference. i have not and will not monetize any of my music videos. i'm comfortable with monetizing this, so why not? but it's not a motive, so much as it's just possible gravy. i'm happy as i am, but could think of plenty of activist things to do with a larger stream of income.
the primary reason i'm doing this is to act as a gateway to the music. when i first put up my other youtube channel, i had no real expectations for it. but, i learned quickly that the commenting system could act as an effective means of promotion so long as i was consistently being interesting or provocative - which are things that i'm naturally good at. i found my hits growing relatively quickly, and on a fairly steep curve, as a consequence of posting insightful, witty and/or challenging comments on other people's videos - or, from time to time, just being a good troll.
over the last few months, youtube has taken steps to hurt "spammers". was i spammer? well, it depends. i was certainly advertising, but it was through the stealth approach of posing interesting questions rather than the obvious approach of pushing links in your face. i might suggest we're all better off for that and it's a kind of fair game type of spamming. but, purposefully or collaterally, i was caught up in the anti-spam shifts and have seen hits come down dramatically. as i understand that this is systemic, i realize i need to take further steps.
now, a vlog can only act as a frontend for something else if it is actually interesting, and can actually hold an audience, and the fact that i think i can do this is a big part of the point. on the one hand: merely look at my comments. look at the arguments, debates, discussions. i'm obviously able to generate interest. it's more than that.
i think the primary reason i'm of interest is that i can offer a worldview into a "real life" transgendered person. by that, what i mean is a lower class transgendered person that neither lives a celebrity lifestyle nor has had any plastic surgery. the media is complicit in this perpetual, brutal stereotyping of transwomen as these passive little barbified bimbos that spend their whole lives fantasizing about becoming porn stars. i don't wear fishnets. i don't have a boob job. i don't talk like rupaul. i'm really rather shockingly normal. i think that this kind of realness is what is missing from the conversation, because so many of us are so shy and so unwilling to draw attention to it. i can walk into this space fairly freely; i openly identify as specifically trans and will actually correct you if you suggest or imply otherwise. i have no social aspirations in either gender for this kind of open discussion to interfere with. hopefully, by presenting the perspective of a "normal" trans person, i can help break down stereotypes of the shallow, materialistic porn star or model wannabe transfemale. did you know that transgendered people are actually statistically of greater likelihood to be of above average intelligence? it's a condition that is actually correlated very strongly with bookishness, aloof intellectualism and sometimes crippling levels of introversion. very few of us want to be porn stars. most of us would prefer to spend a saturday night in the library than at the club.
the second reason is that i often find myself walking over long distances and mentally putting aside thoughts to write down somewhere later. as i spend a lot of time walking, i spend a lot of time thinking. i think some of these thoughts are worth sharing. this goes back to the same political motives i have in ranting everywhere. i suppose this is more of the traditional vlog, right: the webcam in the bedroom. but, i won't do that. if i'm at home, i'd actually prefer to write it down - i think more fluidly when i'm typing. rather, a substantial part of this blog is going to be me talking into the camera as i'm walking around in the wee hours of the morning, ejecting scattered thoughts and various insights.
that brings up another point: i'm a single person. this is by choice, by desire and without any reservations. i couldn't imagine not being single. but, what that means is that this is an exercise in introversion, rather than a display of social behaviour. as an outlet, that might be healthy, for me.
i also think it will be good for me to need to have a greater incentive to focus on how i present myself. as i'm single, and live on disability, i can go through rather long periods of personal neglect. if i need to be on screen every day, or every other day, that is going to make a big difference in how i treat myself, which will have consequences in terms of self-esteem. i think this will be good for me.
so, these are the social and personal goals i have in running a vlog. they may not always be obvious, as you're following me to a concert or watching me make lunch. but, i hope that i'm able to use this vlog both to build awareness and to help myself deal with various issues - as well as to draw attention to myself as a working artist.
https://plus.google.com/u/0/b/108929126523080872678/108929126523080872678/posts/fHiPrp3Rwd8
Saturday, October 17, 2015
so, i'm launching a vlog...
in fact, i wish i had launched this three or four years ago. it could have caught me hitch-hiking, or maybe caught a few things from occupy.
vlogs are largely trivial. it's what a vlog is. sometimes, you'll have to watch me make spaghetti or something. but, i go for long walks, too - routinely. not just in windsor, but also in detroit. concerts. recording. overall, i'm probably considerably more exciting than you or most people you know are, even if i'm essentially always by myself.
what i'm thinking is that it might act as a reasonable front-end for the music production. i was using the comment system to great effect for a while, but youtube then went and changed the way the system works in such a way that it almost seems designed to explicitly prevent me from doing what i was doing. they sell ads, right? if i'm using the comment system for free advertising, i'm breaking their model. so, they've done several things - i could list 5 or 6 - to make it harder for people like me to do what i was doing. i got a little touch of exposure, anyways - enough to make me think restrategizing is worthwhile. but, it's clear that they've broken what i was doing. they've crashed me from 200 hits/day to 10 hits/day.
this seems to be a better advertising strategy for right now. we'll see how it goes.
i bought a $50 camera from best buy. it should be here in five or six days. expect this to launch saturday; i'll be posting daily updates here, as well.
in fact, i wish i had launched this three or four years ago. it could have caught me hitch-hiking, or maybe caught a few things from occupy.
vlogs are largely trivial. it's what a vlog is. sometimes, you'll have to watch me make spaghetti or something. but, i go for long walks, too - routinely. not just in windsor, but also in detroit. concerts. recording. overall, i'm probably considerably more exciting than you or most people you know are, even if i'm essentially always by myself.
what i'm thinking is that it might act as a reasonable front-end for the music production. i was using the comment system to great effect for a while, but youtube then went and changed the way the system works in such a way that it almost seems designed to explicitly prevent me from doing what i was doing. they sell ads, right? if i'm using the comment system for free advertising, i'm breaking their model. so, they've done several things - i could list 5 or 6 - to make it harder for people like me to do what i was doing. i got a little touch of exposure, anyways - enough to make me think restrategizing is worthwhile. but, it's clear that they've broken what i was doing. they've crashed me from 200 hits/day to 10 hits/day.
this seems to be a better advertising strategy for right now. we'll see how it goes.
i bought a $50 camera from best buy. it should be here in five or six days. expect this to launch saturday; i'll be posting daily updates here, as well.
yeah.
i just ordered this cheap little guy:
i'd normally go and pick it up because shipping is half the price of the object, but this looks like it's last gen - that they're trying to get rid of it, really - and so it's free shipping.
the key point is it's cheap. but, it's also waterproof, which is....i'm not going to go swimming with it, but i don't want to worry about it in the rain, either.
the actual truth is that i'm really not well-versed in the language of megapixels and digital video. i'm going to guess that the differences in video quality past a certain point are largely trivial. and, you know, i don't know how long i'm going to do this for. i'm not expecting pristine quality, but i'm maybe not requiring it just quite yet, either. i'm sure it'll be fine - or better than fine, really.
i've got plenty of rechargeable batteries, although i'll have to experiment with how much power the device uses. i'll have to figure out how much storage i'm going to need for an average ten hour adventure and get the right sized sd card, as well. i suspect my old 2 gb card for pictures is too small.
the actual reality is that this device was probably ten times the price ten years ago. this is how i operate with technology - i wait, i get the last gen when it's falling into obsolescence and then i actually use it to it's potential. i'm lucky enough to be living through the period where technology is plateauing, allowing for what is truly high end technology to sell for basically nothing, in order to drive the market. i actually probably fluked out on that.
should be here by friday.
i just ordered this cheap little guy:
i'd normally go and pick it up because shipping is half the price of the object, but this looks like it's last gen - that they're trying to get rid of it, really - and so it's free shipping.
the key point is it's cheap. but, it's also waterproof, which is....i'm not going to go swimming with it, but i don't want to worry about it in the rain, either.
the actual truth is that i'm really not well-versed in the language of megapixels and digital video. i'm going to guess that the differences in video quality past a certain point are largely trivial. and, you know, i don't know how long i'm going to do this for. i'm not expecting pristine quality, but i'm maybe not requiring it just quite yet, either. i'm sure it'll be fine - or better than fine, really.
i've got plenty of rechargeable batteries, although i'll have to experiment with how much power the device uses. i'll have to figure out how much storage i'm going to need for an average ten hour adventure and get the right sized sd card, as well. i suspect my old 2 gb card for pictures is too small.
the actual reality is that this device was probably ten times the price ten years ago. this is how i operate with technology - i wait, i get the last gen when it's falling into obsolescence and then i actually use it to it's potential. i'm lucky enough to be living through the period where technology is plateauing, allowing for what is truly high end technology to sell for basically nothing, in order to drive the market. i actually probably fluked out on that.
should be here by friday.
i'm thinking about starting a vlog.
all the popular vlogs are families. it's great and everything, from a certain perspective, i guess. i think i have something a bit more unique to offer - single transgender canadian that is a total loner and is right on the us border and that is often on foot, heads to concerts, etc.
i guess a lot of it is going to be kind of trivial, but it's what a vlog is, right? a lot of it it's going to be me walking around by myself and talking into the mic.
i think there's some other upsides to it. i would be comfortable monetizing a vlog channel, for example - i won't monetize the music channel. it could maybe create exposure for the music, and possibly even income.
i'm sort of wishing i'd vlogged some of the more erratic moments of the last three or four years. hitch-hiking from ottawa to windsor, through toronto, would be great to have on tape; i tried to document it through writing, but it only gets you so far. and i'm sure i'll have more than a few more crazy moments.
in fact, i suspect halloween could be a bit of a ride, with deafhaven early and probably hitting a rave later. it's going to depend on the weather, though - i'm not floating around detroit all night if it's snowing.
all the popular vlogs are families. it's great and everything, from a certain perspective, i guess. i think i have something a bit more unique to offer - single transgender canadian that is a total loner and is right on the us border and that is often on foot, heads to concerts, etc.
i guess a lot of it is going to be kind of trivial, but it's what a vlog is, right? a lot of it it's going to be me walking around by myself and talking into the mic.
i think there's some other upsides to it. i would be comfortable monetizing a vlog channel, for example - i won't monetize the music channel. it could maybe create exposure for the music, and possibly even income.
i'm sort of wishing i'd vlogged some of the more erratic moments of the last three or four years. hitch-hiking from ottawa to windsor, through toronto, would be great to have on tape; i tried to document it through writing, but it only gets you so far. and i'm sure i'll have more than a few more crazy moments.
in fact, i suspect halloween could be a bit of a ride, with deafhaven early and probably hitting a rave later. it's going to depend on the weather, though - i'm not floating around detroit all night if it's snowing.
Friday, October 16, 2015
i've been over this before. they expect me to show up dressed like a prostitute. and i think a part of it may be trying to get them to understand that i'm 35 years old. i don't look it. i get that. but the truth is that i'm old, and i dress like i'm old, which is to be expected. i don't have any patience with this "35 is the new 25" stuff, and this refusal to grow up. i don't want to be 25. i'm happy to be out of that headspace. i don't want to walk into a doctor's office and be analyzed like a piece of meat.
it's dehumanizing.
these doctors - they're creepy old men. i'd mostly rather they didn't touch me at all, kind of thing. to have them evaluate your gender based on whether they find you attractive is - there's something wrong with this. it's like, "i'm wearing a sweater because i don't want your creepy ass ogling me, you sonofabitch.".
they honestly seem to expect me to walk in in fishnets and heels and laugh provocatively when they speak. it's really disgusting.
it's this base archetype of patriarchally enforced "femininity" that they want reflected back at them.
i had one ask "what are you, some kind of lesbian?".
like as though that might disqualify me, if it were true. (i'm asexual. just no interest in sex.)
i had another frown and clearly write me off when i claimed i was a feminist. as though transwomen being feminists is some kind of contradiction, and disqualifying.
it's 2015, guys. i know you're in your 60s. but, you could try to keep up just a little.
it's dehumanizing.
these doctors - they're creepy old men. i'd mostly rather they didn't touch me at all, kind of thing. to have them evaluate your gender based on whether they find you attractive is - there's something wrong with this. it's like, "i'm wearing a sweater because i don't want your creepy ass ogling me, you sonofabitch.".
they honestly seem to expect me to walk in in fishnets and heels and laugh provocatively when they speak. it's really disgusting.
it's this base archetype of patriarchally enforced "femininity" that they want reflected back at them.
i had one ask "what are you, some kind of lesbian?".
like as though that might disqualify me, if it were true. (i'm asexual. just no interest in sex.)
i had another frown and clearly write me off when i claimed i was a feminist. as though transwomen being feminists is some kind of contradiction, and disqualifying.
it's 2015, guys. i know you're in your 60s. but, you could try to keep up just a little.
that week just zoomed by...
i've had some running around to do with doctors. again. they're such assholes. and often surprisingly averse to evidence-based reasoning, in favour of rigidity to strict protocol. you'd think you're dealing with the military half the time...
they've got me in this ridiculous loop. the same people that just rediagnosed me with gender dysphoria want me to go through a training program in toronto for people that have yet been diagnosed. this is ridiculous; i could be teaching the program. but, i'd do it if it's a day program and there's an easy end to it. but, it's a months long program with a year long waiting list. and, here's the bizarre part: there's an open letter on their web page requesting that doctors do not send people through this program and just assign hormones themselves.
so, they won't represcribe until they send me through a program that is telling them to go ahead and prescribe already. it's just rigidity to a set of protocols, oblivious of anything resembling independent thought or adherence to logic.
you can imagine a far side cartoon at a school for the gifted with a star on the floor beside a christmas tree and a child frowning - because there's no instruction manual.
so, i'm calling more doctors. and more doctors. until i can find one with some common fucking sense. surely, it's inevitable, right?
i mean, it's not an option to go off hormones. i can't detransition. i'm already done. i'd sooner kill myself than put myself in that kind of state. and, if i do, it will be in their front office.
i've got some things done, though, and am ready to sit down for a few days.
i'm going to take a shower this afternoon and should hopefully get some more troubleshooting in tonight.
i've had some running around to do with doctors. again. they're such assholes. and often surprisingly averse to evidence-based reasoning, in favour of rigidity to strict protocol. you'd think you're dealing with the military half the time...
they've got me in this ridiculous loop. the same people that just rediagnosed me with gender dysphoria want me to go through a training program in toronto for people that have yet been diagnosed. this is ridiculous; i could be teaching the program. but, i'd do it if it's a day program and there's an easy end to it. but, it's a months long program with a year long waiting list. and, here's the bizarre part: there's an open letter on their web page requesting that doctors do not send people through this program and just assign hormones themselves.
so, they won't represcribe until they send me through a program that is telling them to go ahead and prescribe already. it's just rigidity to a set of protocols, oblivious of anything resembling independent thought or adherence to logic.
you can imagine a far side cartoon at a school for the gifted with a star on the floor beside a christmas tree and a child frowning - because there's no instruction manual.
so, i'm calling more doctors. and more doctors. until i can find one with some common fucking sense. surely, it's inevitable, right?
i mean, it's not an option to go off hormones. i can't detransition. i'm already done. i'd sooner kill myself than put myself in that kind of state. and, if i do, it will be in their front office.
i've got some things done, though, and am ready to sit down for a few days.
i'm going to take a shower this afternoon and should hopefully get some more troubleshooting in tonight.
Monday, October 5, 2015
Sunday, October 4, 2015
this stranger in detroit very nearly ended up buried from an unplanned overnight in the cold
about a year ago, detroit's famous punk rock bowling alley bar unleashed a minor crisis in the city by converting itself into a split disco/folk bar (disco upstairs, indie/folk downstairs), supposedly under the impression that the punk rock era was over. generations of rock fans in the city have been going through the stages of loss ever since, stuck somewhere between anger and depression. the topic still comes up regularly in smoking sections, with the lone explorer that's set foot in the new world reporting their findings to shocked listeners who can't believe it's really that bad.
"the whole upstairs is a disco club?"
"yup. all of it."
"there's no other section? it's ALL disco? it's really that bad?"
"yup. the whole thing."
"no. like, i mean - not even a room..."
"all of it. it really is that bad."
whether due to popular outcry or increasing financial losses or some other reason, the downstairs folk section seems to be in the process of converting itself back into a punk bar. want my honest guess? punk rock fans are losers, sure. but we're not the massive dorks that an indie/folk bar will bring in. you don't sell a lot of beer to these people. they drink herbal tea, and complain that the smoker on the other side of the room walked by them on the way in, which will possibly affect their grandchildren by offsetting their genetic energy.
bars will always serve punks because we're the market. there's no deficit of coffee houses for the indie dorks to congregate in.
detroit is currently a mess, as woodward is still being torn up. to be frank, i completely forgot that was happening, and walked directly into the construction without any knowledge of detours; thankfully, very little was required. but, it was a cold and very dark walk through broken concrete. i had the first jjjjjjjjjjjjj record in the phones, which was rather effective over it's second, atmospheric half. and, i can report that it sounded correctly through the mp3 player, as well.
https://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/album/jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj
sisters of your sunshine vapor are a local act that i've near-missed repeatedly, but finally caught last night. you can guess by their name that they want to exist in a specific period, but the result is somewhat stale; i was waiting for the stonehenge to fall rather than looking around for the ghost of syd. but, calling something stale does not suggest that it's terrible. the rhythm section is actually pretty solid. what they really need, i would argue, is a second guitarist to fill the sound out a little and take it over the top.
bands like this tend to float for long periods without accomplishing anything, but there's a long shot possibility that they might develop.
it'd been three or four years since i'd heard any grooms, and they've definitely expanded their sound quite a bit. they've also become a three piece, it seems. this is the only video i could find of them as a three piece...
they still sound a lot like sonic youth, but they seem to be trying to break away from it. you can tell because they're moving in multiple directions. i've seen this a thousand times and it works out one of two ways: if they settle on a specific sound, it will no doubt be because they get some kind of financial pull on it. then, the focus becomes on compressing the sound as much as possible, and it quickly becomes boring. but, if they keep flailing around and the experiments increase rather than decrease then they have the potential to take it to the next level.
it's hard to say what direction they're going in. for the moment, the set was hit and miss: when they wanted to rock, they could and did but a lot of it was passive and mediocre jangle-pop.
so, i'm learning that a part of the experience of living in detroit is developing a healthy level of cautious fear regarding the architecture, and then conquering it.
i didn't see a lot of shows upstairs before it transitioned, but the ones i saw were loud: cloud nothings, boris. the place shook. like, uncomfortably. as the opening sets were playing, it actually crossed my mind a few times that this was better because we're closer to the ground, so it shouldn't be so scary.
but, it only took a few seconds before the wobble asserted itself. i've been to enough shows to know that this was more than the bass from the speakers; the floor was shaking left-to-right. that is, perpendicular to the motion of the sound waves. very bad.
i took a look outside and saw the concrete torn up, right to the front door. what's under the building? three hundred years of caverns, sewers? hidden treasures? masonic lodges? hoffa? who knows; but i know i'm not on solid ground. and, what are the chances that detroit found it in it's budget to do a proper engineering assessment to put in the rail system? you think that's on illitch' mind? you think he cares at all? no; i'm thinking that chances are high that there was no assessment done at all...
i had to move back a little, which blunted the physical effect of the sound. i'm aware that this is a large part of the experience; i've been to plenty of shows where the sound is pummelling. but, i think my intuition of my surroundings was justified.
i did slowly move up, but the show was done by the time i was getting the courage to get to the front.
there was a benefit, though: i got to see a relatively interesting light show from a bit of distance. you can't see it in this video, presumably because the camera is too close. but it's a wall of white light surrounding the stage, making the band members appear as apparitions. simple but effective.
as for the band? they're a known entity in what they do; joy division goes grunge. swans performing nirvana covers. brutal and dark, but always melodic and never stupid. creative use of guitar effects. but, you're not getting half of it by watching this video. this is a band that you'll get the most out of by seeing live, and letting the sound physically affect you.
and, as for myself, i need to get over this fear of detroit's architecture, as healthy as it may be.
i hadn't bothered to check the time; it was moving a little slower than normal, due to a chance encounter in the smoking section before aptbs. but, i get out and check my clock and it's three minutes until the last bus. no chance. shit.
i make the decision to walk to the tunnel and wait for a cab, aware that i'm still feeling a little funny from the chance encounter and thinking i'm probably better off getting a coffee, anyways. after waiting at the bus station for a while, i finally approach the border guards to ask them to call me a cab.
"call you a cab?"
"yeah."
"where are you from?"
"i live in windsor."
"they call cabs in downtown windsor?"
"well, i'm from ottawa. i don't know. i never use taxis, i walk everywhere, it's just that you've got all these barricades here preventing me from getting home unless i'm inside an automobile of some sort."
"it's a security concern."
"can you call me a cab, please?"
"no. what you do is go to that road over there and wait for one to drive by."
i've really never done that before. like i say: i walk everywhere. but, sure enough, there's a sign on the road that i don't think i've ever seen before: taxi stand.
it's about ten minutes, which is not bad.
"how much to get just across the border?"
"across what border?"
"to canada."
"to canada? you have documents?"
"yup."
"$60."
i got him down to $50, but that was it.
see, here's the thing: even if i could afford that, and was willing to pay it, i'd still be stuck. my bank card only works in canada. i had $17 in cash on me, which i thought would be enough - it's literally two minutes to the other side. but, the cabbie is concerned about getting searched by customs ("i'm a muslim. they always search me.") and it's just a no go.
a few minutes later, cabbie #2 pulls up...
$60. still. he tells me it's a flat rate set by the company due to losses stemming from hold ups in customs.
so, basically, i have to pay $60 for a two minute drive across the border that i'm not allowed to walk because border security does routine racial profiling on cabbies doing their job. great system. very efficient.
in the end, i was at the bus stop for more than 6.5 hours: from 1:45 to 8:30. i took a few walks. i spent well over an hour on the couch in the fancy hotel lobby across the street when i was getting a little cold; strangely, nobody asked me to leave. i was dressed to be able to walk for a few hours, but not to sit outside for six hours so it was really necessary to get in and warm up. another novelty was getting back pennies on a coffee purchase, which no longer exist in canada.
i asked two different cops if they could just shuttle me over, and they both refused. as mentioned, it's a two-minute drive under the bridge, if that. i had documents. 10 degrees isn't enough to kill you after even a few hours, but after 6 hours? as mentioned: i went in repeatedly, because the shivering felt as though it was onsetting hypothermia, and i do believe that this is the right range of temperatures.
i'm considering looking into the responses the cops provided me and pushing the point. i do believe that they should have been required to shuttle me across.
but, i know now that catching a cab in the middle of the night isn't an option and that if i'm stuck downtown then i need to find an all-night coffee shop close to the venue.
http://dghjdfsghkrdghdgja.appspot.com/categories/shows/2015/10/03.html
"the whole upstairs is a disco club?"
"yup. all of it."
"there's no other section? it's ALL disco? it's really that bad?"
"yup. the whole thing."
"no. like, i mean - not even a room..."
"all of it. it really is that bad."
whether due to popular outcry or increasing financial losses or some other reason, the downstairs folk section seems to be in the process of converting itself back into a punk bar. want my honest guess? punk rock fans are losers, sure. but we're not the massive dorks that an indie/folk bar will bring in. you don't sell a lot of beer to these people. they drink herbal tea, and complain that the smoker on the other side of the room walked by them on the way in, which will possibly affect their grandchildren by offsetting their genetic energy.
bars will always serve punks because we're the market. there's no deficit of coffee houses for the indie dorks to congregate in.
detroit is currently a mess, as woodward is still being torn up. to be frank, i completely forgot that was happening, and walked directly into the construction without any knowledge of detours; thankfully, very little was required. but, it was a cold and very dark walk through broken concrete. i had the first jjjjjjjjjjjjj record in the phones, which was rather effective over it's second, atmospheric half. and, i can report that it sounded correctly through the mp3 player, as well.
https://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/album/jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj
sisters of your sunshine vapor are a local act that i've near-missed repeatedly, but finally caught last night. you can guess by their name that they want to exist in a specific period, but the result is somewhat stale; i was waiting for the stonehenge to fall rather than looking around for the ghost of syd. but, calling something stale does not suggest that it's terrible. the rhythm section is actually pretty solid. what they really need, i would argue, is a second guitarist to fill the sound out a little and take it over the top.
bands like this tend to float for long periods without accomplishing anything, but there's a long shot possibility that they might develop.
it'd been three or four years since i'd heard any grooms, and they've definitely expanded their sound quite a bit. they've also become a three piece, it seems. this is the only video i could find of them as a three piece...
they still sound a lot like sonic youth, but they seem to be trying to break away from it. you can tell because they're moving in multiple directions. i've seen this a thousand times and it works out one of two ways: if they settle on a specific sound, it will no doubt be because they get some kind of financial pull on it. then, the focus becomes on compressing the sound as much as possible, and it quickly becomes boring. but, if they keep flailing around and the experiments increase rather than decrease then they have the potential to take it to the next level.
it's hard to say what direction they're going in. for the moment, the set was hit and miss: when they wanted to rock, they could and did but a lot of it was passive and mediocre jangle-pop.
so, i'm learning that a part of the experience of living in detroit is developing a healthy level of cautious fear regarding the architecture, and then conquering it.
i didn't see a lot of shows upstairs before it transitioned, but the ones i saw were loud: cloud nothings, boris. the place shook. like, uncomfortably. as the opening sets were playing, it actually crossed my mind a few times that this was better because we're closer to the ground, so it shouldn't be so scary.
but, it only took a few seconds before the wobble asserted itself. i've been to enough shows to know that this was more than the bass from the speakers; the floor was shaking left-to-right. that is, perpendicular to the motion of the sound waves. very bad.
i took a look outside and saw the concrete torn up, right to the front door. what's under the building? three hundred years of caverns, sewers? hidden treasures? masonic lodges? hoffa? who knows; but i know i'm not on solid ground. and, what are the chances that detroit found it in it's budget to do a proper engineering assessment to put in the rail system? you think that's on illitch' mind? you think he cares at all? no; i'm thinking that chances are high that there was no assessment done at all...
i had to move back a little, which blunted the physical effect of the sound. i'm aware that this is a large part of the experience; i've been to plenty of shows where the sound is pummelling. but, i think my intuition of my surroundings was justified.
i did slowly move up, but the show was done by the time i was getting the courage to get to the front.
there was a benefit, though: i got to see a relatively interesting light show from a bit of distance. you can't see it in this video, presumably because the camera is too close. but it's a wall of white light surrounding the stage, making the band members appear as apparitions. simple but effective.
as for the band? they're a known entity in what they do; joy division goes grunge. swans performing nirvana covers. brutal and dark, but always melodic and never stupid. creative use of guitar effects. but, you're not getting half of it by watching this video. this is a band that you'll get the most out of by seeing live, and letting the sound physically affect you.
and, as for myself, i need to get over this fear of detroit's architecture, as healthy as it may be.
i hadn't bothered to check the time; it was moving a little slower than normal, due to a chance encounter in the smoking section before aptbs. but, i get out and check my clock and it's three minutes until the last bus. no chance. shit.
i make the decision to walk to the tunnel and wait for a cab, aware that i'm still feeling a little funny from the chance encounter and thinking i'm probably better off getting a coffee, anyways. after waiting at the bus station for a while, i finally approach the border guards to ask them to call me a cab.
"call you a cab?"
"yeah."
"where are you from?"
"i live in windsor."
"they call cabs in downtown windsor?"
"well, i'm from ottawa. i don't know. i never use taxis, i walk everywhere, it's just that you've got all these barricades here preventing me from getting home unless i'm inside an automobile of some sort."
"it's a security concern."
"can you call me a cab, please?"
"no. what you do is go to that road over there and wait for one to drive by."
i've really never done that before. like i say: i walk everywhere. but, sure enough, there's a sign on the road that i don't think i've ever seen before: taxi stand.
it's about ten minutes, which is not bad.
"how much to get just across the border?"
"across what border?"
"to canada."
"to canada? you have documents?"
"yup."
"$60."
i got him down to $50, but that was it.
see, here's the thing: even if i could afford that, and was willing to pay it, i'd still be stuck. my bank card only works in canada. i had $17 in cash on me, which i thought would be enough - it's literally two minutes to the other side. but, the cabbie is concerned about getting searched by customs ("i'm a muslim. they always search me.") and it's just a no go.
a few minutes later, cabbie #2 pulls up...
$60. still. he tells me it's a flat rate set by the company due to losses stemming from hold ups in customs.
so, basically, i have to pay $60 for a two minute drive across the border that i'm not allowed to walk because border security does routine racial profiling on cabbies doing their job. great system. very efficient.
in the end, i was at the bus stop for more than 6.5 hours: from 1:45 to 8:30. i took a few walks. i spent well over an hour on the couch in the fancy hotel lobby across the street when i was getting a little cold; strangely, nobody asked me to leave. i was dressed to be able to walk for a few hours, but not to sit outside for six hours so it was really necessary to get in and warm up. another novelty was getting back pennies on a coffee purchase, which no longer exist in canada.
i asked two different cops if they could just shuttle me over, and they both refused. as mentioned, it's a two-minute drive under the bridge, if that. i had documents. 10 degrees isn't enough to kill you after even a few hours, but after 6 hours? as mentioned: i went in repeatedly, because the shivering felt as though it was onsetting hypothermia, and i do believe that this is the right range of temperatures.
i'm considering looking into the responses the cops provided me and pushing the point. i do believe that they should have been required to shuttle me across.
but, i know now that catching a cab in the middle of the night isn't an option and that if i'm stuck downtown then i need to find an all-night coffee shop close to the venue.
http://dghjdfsghkrdghdgja.appspot.com/categories/shows/2015/10/03.html
Tuesday, September 29, 2015
exploring a little closer to home (math rock bands on crooked floors)
well, i've either got a mosquito bite on my forehead or i'm developing a third eye. want to take bets on that?
i didn't get any cleaning done the other day; i got stuck in an algorithm on youtube, which ended up crashing the browser. 2500 open tabs. in hindsight, i suppose it's not possible to watch all of youtube. i hope to get that done with the rest of today, and get back at it tomorrow. i'm feeling rejuvenated and eager to move forwards.
i hit a house show last night with two mildly interesting acts, both of which demonstrated some potential, but neither of which held up as well as they could have. reviews in the comments.
in two years here, it was actually the first time i've taken a walk away from downtown after dark. i knew i was going to be walking through the wealthy part of the downtown core, but it took on a different feeling in the moonlight due to how clear it is that i was walking through a neighbourhood built by very old money. the churches, the collegiates, the mansions - these are all still standing, and all still in use. i suppose that it's only different from what i'm used to in ottawa in terms of how explicit it is; it may have been similar to walking through the glebe thirty or forty years ago, but i'm not old enough to remember what that may have been like.
the key thing you notice when you cross the street into the old money is how dark the neighbourhood is. the houses are old, but taken care of - likely professionally. they're dark because they're empty. one imagines widowers living off investments made by ancestors they've never met; sum totals of labour that exist of shuffling portfolios. these ten or fifteen room houses were built for families, and were no doubt once inhabited, but today they are merely equity passed down through generations. you'll see a jogger here and there; a dog walker, a couple. but, these are not castles, not sanctuaries to escape from the blood-thirsty masses. rather, they're empty relics of the past.
and, one exits this space as quickly as one enters it: a highway appears, and once one crosses it they are back to the normalcy of post-industrial decay. buildings that, though a quarter the age, are falling apart due to low maintenance. the whiff of marijuana replaces the soft background scent of professional gardens. but, i am crossing to the right side of the road, not the wrong side of it.
the show was outside, in a large lot (perhaps originally two) that's been split into three: a small house faces the street, with an equally sized secondary bungalow right behind it, that must be accessed via a path along the first one. you could spit from the back deck of the first to the front porch of the other. it seems almost as though the back house was moved in from somewhere else. an empty lot of the same size exists next door, apparently reclaimed by these inhabitants for events, although if the city were to appear out of the bushes with an ordinance, they would no doubt be told to exit the empty and adjacent lot. mosquitoes are endemic; in addition to the bite on my forehead, i've got a dozen on my unshielded arms. should have worn a long sleeve t-shirt...
sly why was up first (after a short set by some kind of radio show). i've seen sly why before, but with a band; i initially thought this was a dj set. rather, it was the front person for the band doing a solo set that integrated live keyboard playing & rhyming over some drum & bass machine work. the sum total was likely meant to exist in a flying lotus type space, but with a heavier emphasis on hip-hop and quite a bit more of a chick corea feel. in principle, this is an excellent idea. unfortunately, the execution was a little off.
the chick corea sound (i'm talking more about miles davis than return to forever) is two things: it's an aesthetic and it's a playing style. related things, but they're different. the aesthetic was pulled off very well, but a musician listening in would be unimpressed by the actual playing. he seemed to want to go into long interludes of piano work; these were effective when they were focused, but often sounded aimless and improvised. it's one thing to try and get the corea aesthetic; it's another to think you seriously actually have the talent to try and pull off that kind of improv. i think he needs to kind of make a choice on that: be more focused and drop the solos, or work on his improv skills.
he's definitely not chick corea.
as i believe i said last time, it's a good proof of concept with a lot of potential but it needs some work to actually come together.
this is similar:
this was the first time i've seen noxious foxes, but i remember their early records as being more dynamic than what i got last night. more live playing, intersecting harmonies, leads - less loops. my memory may be skewed; i may go back and listen to their first two records and realize they're more loop-based than i thought. but, it ended up with a pretty strong ian williams feel that really needs to be broken up a bit.
it was fun. i'd pay the $5 a second time. but, they need to be thinking about ways to get out of the box created by writing solely around loop pedals.
http://dghjdfsghkrdghdgja.appspot.com/categories/shows/2015/09/28.html
i didn't get any cleaning done the other day; i got stuck in an algorithm on youtube, which ended up crashing the browser. 2500 open tabs. in hindsight, i suppose it's not possible to watch all of youtube. i hope to get that done with the rest of today, and get back at it tomorrow. i'm feeling rejuvenated and eager to move forwards.
i hit a house show last night with two mildly interesting acts, both of which demonstrated some potential, but neither of which held up as well as they could have. reviews in the comments.
in two years here, it was actually the first time i've taken a walk away from downtown after dark. i knew i was going to be walking through the wealthy part of the downtown core, but it took on a different feeling in the moonlight due to how clear it is that i was walking through a neighbourhood built by very old money. the churches, the collegiates, the mansions - these are all still standing, and all still in use. i suppose that it's only different from what i'm used to in ottawa in terms of how explicit it is; it may have been similar to walking through the glebe thirty or forty years ago, but i'm not old enough to remember what that may have been like.
the key thing you notice when you cross the street into the old money is how dark the neighbourhood is. the houses are old, but taken care of - likely professionally. they're dark because they're empty. one imagines widowers living off investments made by ancestors they've never met; sum totals of labour that exist of shuffling portfolios. these ten or fifteen room houses were built for families, and were no doubt once inhabited, but today they are merely equity passed down through generations. you'll see a jogger here and there; a dog walker, a couple. but, these are not castles, not sanctuaries to escape from the blood-thirsty masses. rather, they're empty relics of the past.
and, one exits this space as quickly as one enters it: a highway appears, and once one crosses it they are back to the normalcy of post-industrial decay. buildings that, though a quarter the age, are falling apart due to low maintenance. the whiff of marijuana replaces the soft background scent of professional gardens. but, i am crossing to the right side of the road, not the wrong side of it.
the show was outside, in a large lot (perhaps originally two) that's been split into three: a small house faces the street, with an equally sized secondary bungalow right behind it, that must be accessed via a path along the first one. you could spit from the back deck of the first to the front porch of the other. it seems almost as though the back house was moved in from somewhere else. an empty lot of the same size exists next door, apparently reclaimed by these inhabitants for events, although if the city were to appear out of the bushes with an ordinance, they would no doubt be told to exit the empty and adjacent lot. mosquitoes are endemic; in addition to the bite on my forehead, i've got a dozen on my unshielded arms. should have worn a long sleeve t-shirt...
sly why was up first (after a short set by some kind of radio show). i've seen sly why before, but with a band; i initially thought this was a dj set. rather, it was the front person for the band doing a solo set that integrated live keyboard playing & rhyming over some drum & bass machine work. the sum total was likely meant to exist in a flying lotus type space, but with a heavier emphasis on hip-hop and quite a bit more of a chick corea feel. in principle, this is an excellent idea. unfortunately, the execution was a little off.
the chick corea sound (i'm talking more about miles davis than return to forever) is two things: it's an aesthetic and it's a playing style. related things, but they're different. the aesthetic was pulled off very well, but a musician listening in would be unimpressed by the actual playing. he seemed to want to go into long interludes of piano work; these were effective when they were focused, but often sounded aimless and improvised. it's one thing to try and get the corea aesthetic; it's another to think you seriously actually have the talent to try and pull off that kind of improv. i think he needs to kind of make a choice on that: be more focused and drop the solos, or work on his improv skills.
he's definitely not chick corea.
as i believe i said last time, it's a good proof of concept with a lot of potential but it needs some work to actually come together.
this is similar:
this was the first time i've seen noxious foxes, but i remember their early records as being more dynamic than what i got last night. more live playing, intersecting harmonies, leads - less loops. my memory may be skewed; i may go back and listen to their first two records and realize they're more loop-based than i thought. but, it ended up with a pretty strong ian williams feel that really needs to be broken up a bit.
it was fun. i'd pay the $5 a second time. but, they need to be thinking about ways to get out of the box created by writing solely around loop pedals.
http://dghjdfsghkrdghdgja.appspot.com/categories/shows/2015/09/28.html
Monday, September 21, 2015
well, i got my forms mailed today. that's to cancel my student loan.
i can't be certain what the bureaucracy will do, but my understanding is that they basically can't overrule the doctor.
so, i'm celebrating this week. which means listening, but carefully - i know i can't mix when i'm celebrating.
and, it means making some different lifestyle choices starting next week.
i can't be certain what the bureaucracy will do, but my understanding is that they basically can't overrule the doctor.
so, i'm celebrating this week. which means listening, but carefully - i know i can't mix when i'm celebrating.
and, it means making some different lifestyle choices starting next week.
Thursday, September 17, 2015
so, after caving into various self-rationalizations over the first half of september, i've been de-nicing the last few days and have every intention to stick with it this time. i've said that for a long time. but, i've got my income stable for the next five years, i'm no longer in a hurry to do much of anything and i'm very much intent on getting over this. i had a little heatstroke when i got back on tuesday night and have been sleeping that off as well, but i think i'm alert enough now to at least try and get the machine back up.
i turned it off tuesday morning right before the script runs. i'm going to want to make sure i can get the firewire drivers correctly working before i run the script.
i didn't get my forms on tuesday. it turns out that the psychiatrist has to fill them out, and i'll have to wait until monday. nor does it seem as though the nurse practitioner is going to carry through with my prescriptions. he claims he'll work as a go between if i can find an endocrinologist, but he won't work with the guy from london because he claims he's unprofessional, which i think is a cop out - i think it's a religious thing, again. he said he put out a referral, but i'm kind of sketchy on it. i'm not convinced it's even a real person. but we'll find out. if i don't have an answer by monday, i'm going to have to get in contact with the guy in london.
i can't think of any reason why i should need to actually go to london and physically speak with him. i'm just asking for a refill of something i've been on for years and will be on for the rest of my life. it should be a five minute conversation, and it's not really necessary. and, if he insists on a blood test or something, i don't see any reason why i can't just get the blood test here and have the results sent to him.
the ideal remains trying to get the guy in windsor to see me because then i can indulge whatever silliness he wants at essentially no cost to me.
i'll find out these things in a few days.
and i think i should have the machine up in a few hours, even if i need to spend a few more days sleeping to finish the detox.
i turned it off tuesday morning right before the script runs. i'm going to want to make sure i can get the firewire drivers correctly working before i run the script.
i didn't get my forms on tuesday. it turns out that the psychiatrist has to fill them out, and i'll have to wait until monday. nor does it seem as though the nurse practitioner is going to carry through with my prescriptions. he claims he'll work as a go between if i can find an endocrinologist, but he won't work with the guy from london because he claims he's unprofessional, which i think is a cop out - i think it's a religious thing, again. he said he put out a referral, but i'm kind of sketchy on it. i'm not convinced it's even a real person. but we'll find out. if i don't have an answer by monday, i'm going to have to get in contact with the guy in london.
i can't think of any reason why i should need to actually go to london and physically speak with him. i'm just asking for a refill of something i've been on for years and will be on for the rest of my life. it should be a five minute conversation, and it's not really necessary. and, if he insists on a blood test or something, i don't see any reason why i can't just get the blood test here and have the results sent to him.
the ideal remains trying to get the guy in windsor to see me because then i can indulge whatever silliness he wants at essentially no cost to me.
i'll find out these things in a few days.
and i think i should have the machine up in a few hours, even if i need to spend a few more days sleeping to finish the detox.
Sunday, September 13, 2015
on second thought, i slept a little later than i planned and i'm not going to be able to hit the show unless i decide not to eat, which i'm not keen on. and, i'm not really up for sitting in that ice cream shop overnight; it's going to be relatively cold. cold snap had to hit tonight, huh? i was a big sonic youth fan years ago, and i'd certainly go if it was across the street but i'm really more focused on what i'm doing...
so, i'm staying in tonight.
i think the mix for nine is done; i was actually fighting with the drivers again last night, as it's fading again. i made the error of accidentally uninstalling the underlying windows drivers, and it seems to have screwed up the asio. i'm going to try to avoid reinstalling, but i may have to. now that i've got asio connected directly to foobar, i have tested it with the windows driver completely uninstalled and it does seem to be stable - lthough i'd like to be able to bring these back in. for now, it seems like i can get the drivers to stay put for a while before i have to reinstall them....it's workable, but i'm still tinkering because i'm still not clear exactly what is causing it to randomly resample...
i think 09 should be up pretty soon.
so, i'm staying in tonight.
i think the mix for nine is done; i was actually fighting with the drivers again last night, as it's fading again. i made the error of accidentally uninstalling the underlying windows drivers, and it seems to have screwed up the asio. i'm going to try to avoid reinstalling, but i may have to. now that i've got asio connected directly to foobar, i have tested it with the windows driver completely uninstalled and it does seem to be stable - lthough i'd like to be able to bring these back in. for now, it seems like i can get the drivers to stay put for a while before i have to reinstall them....it's workable, but i'm still tinkering because i'm still not clear exactly what is causing it to randomly resample...
i think 09 should be up pretty soon.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)