this is a track i tend to find whenever i need to recover or regroup in some way. it's both general and specific enough that it works in pretty much any imaginable context, so long as you need to sit and rest for a while.

I think I'll quit to the valley
Regain my strength and start again

that's today.

back to the struggle, tomorrow.

so, i told you there's a story coming. what am i doing today?

first, i'm going to allow for some reflection before i react. when you go through something that is objectively baffling, it is often a good idea to stop to think before you act. so, i'm processing.

i will at least confess that i've done grocery shopping for the month, and i had put off eating for a bit leading up to late yesterday. so, i've got a few days to catch up on.

and, i told you i was sore...

so, i'm resting my aching body, for right now, catching up on eating and more or less waiting until i stop hurting before i decide what to do next.

i'll have something written up when i'm ready. it won't be more than a few days.

it was at least an absolutely beautiful day here yesterday, even if it ended in a ridiculous torrential downpour.

and, the story has a happy ending.

but you'll need to wait for it.

the kind of masculinity that comes out of these situations when you're forced to get what are at their core exceedingly macho guys, some of which are more comfortable with their sexuality than others, interact with 120 pound transwomen in tight or revealing clothing is often confusing and contradictory, because one minute they're grab-handing you like you're a dude, and the next minute they're telling you to make a sandwich.

everything else aside, the story of the night was a really stark experience of coming face-to-face with sheer patriarchy.

the story will come in time as my head is still blurry, but i was actually told by one of the better cops i was dealing with at about 3:00 am on tuesday morning to go home and make sandwiches.

and, i don't even think he realized what he said.

shhh.